The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided apply to most emotional malfunctions, including depression, substance abuse, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and self-esteem and motivation issues. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.
“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid, Málaga)
Perfectionism and Unreasonable Expectations
Negative self-analysis compels us to overcompensate. A byproduct of overcompensation is perfectionism. Perfectionism causes us to set unreasonable expectations.
None of us is perfect. We all conceal things about ourselves that make us appear defective or inadequate. Often, we hide these indiscretions from ourselves by engaging in defense mechanisms such as denial and projection. Or we cognitively distort our toxic behaviors to justify or validate them. We distract, project, and rationalize.
Living with persistent negative self-beliefsfor years on end is emotionally destabilizing. Persons experiencing social anxiety crave interconnectedness, but fears of intimacy and rejection challenge the wherewithal to establish and maintain healthy relationships. Our fears of negative judgment and criticism limit creativity and interactivity. These difficulties challenge our psychological health, compelling us to use defense mechanisms. Any mental process that protects us from our fears, anxieties, and threats to our emotional well-being can be considered a defense mechanism.
Defense mechanisms are psychological responses that protect us from our unrelenting anxieties. They temporarily appease our sense of helplessness, hopelessness, undesirability, and worthlessness. They allow us to twist reality to conform to our irrational and unhealthy conduct.
Defense mechanisms are short-term safeguards against the thoughts and emotions that are difficult for our conscious minds to manage. Most, like compensation, substance abuse, and projection are methods of avoidance – unhealthy resolutions to our fears and anxieties that offer temporary respite but do little to moderate them in the long term.
Some defense mechanisms, when used appropriately, can be beneficial. Without coping mechanisms, healthy or otherwise, we can experience decompensation – the inability or unwillingness to generate effective psychological alternatives to stress – resulting in personality disturbance or disintegration.
Compensation
Compensation is when we excel in one area of our lives to counteract real or perceived deficits in another. The socially inadequate becomes an actor or musician. A teenager compensates for learning difficulties by excelling in sports.
Compensation has healthy applications. We compensate for our adverse thoughts and behaviors by replacing them with positive, productive ones. We compensate for our low self-esteem by becoming mindful of our character strengths, virtues, and achievements.
Our social anxiety has negatively impacted our emotional well-being and quality of life since childhood. Our obsession with our performance and shortcomings is a constant self-reminder of our imperfections. Our symptomatic negative self-analysis provides feelings of incompetence and undesirability. These self-attributions compel us to overcompensate, which drives us to create unreasonable expectations.
An expectation, by definition, is afervid emotional belief that something will take place in the future.When we set expectations, we invest an interest in their outcome. An unreasonable expectation is unsound and will likely be unmet.
The Problem of Perfectionism
An unhealthy byproduct of overcompensation is falling into the trap of perfectionism. This is especially prevalent in persons experiencing anxiety and depression. Perfectionism causes us to set unreasonable expectations to compensate for our perceived deficiencies. Let’s discuss some glaring similarities between social anxiety disorder and perfectionism.
Seek Progress, Not Perfection
SAD persons worry about their performance before and during a situation and obsess about the outcome long after. We fear negative appraisal and rejection. We beat ourselves up when our unreasonable expectations are unmet. Perfectionism is not the desire to do well but the need to be faultless. Anything less is unsatisfactory. Perfectionism and social anxiety have a parallel relationship.
Perfectionists and SAD persons have lower implicit and explicit self-esteem relative to healthy controls.
A perfectionist perceives anything less than perfection as failure. It’s the all-or-nothing distortion of polarized thinking common among SAD persons. We see things as absolute – black or white. There is no middle ground, no compromise. We are either brilliant or abject failures. Our friends are for us or against us. If we are not faultless, we must be broken and inept.
Perfectionists and SAD persons avoid situations that project potential failure. We worry so much about doing or saying something inappropriate that we procrastinate or avoid the situation entirely. This avoidance exacerbates our isolation and loneliness.
Perfectionists do not take criticism well. A prevailing symptom of social anxiety disorder is the fear of situations in which we may be negatively judged, criticized, or ridiculed. Because of our critical nature and tendency to reject out of fear of rejection, perfectionists and SAD persons are, ostensibly, lonely or isolated, which seriously impacts our ability to initiate, develop, and sustain satisfying relationships.
Perfectionists obsess over their perceived imperfections. Rather than taking pride in their abilities, they prioritize their faults. Filteringis a cognitive distortion common to SAD persons. We selectively choose our perspective. We focus on the negative aspects of a situation and exclude the positive. Negative filtering sustains our toxic core and intermediate beliefs. Example: A dozen colleagues celebrate our promotion; one ignores us. We obsess over the lone individual over the goodwill of the others.
Unmet Expectations
What happens in the likelihood our unreasonable expectations are unmet? Because we have a vested interest, we are psychologically attached to the outcome. Fixed In our minds, we see it as a reality. When it does not go our way, we experience distress and disappointment.
Experts describe the reaction to disappointment as a form of sadness – an expression of desperation or grief due to loss. While it is true that we cannot lose what we have not acquired, fixing the expectation in our mind makes it real and visceral. Unmet expectations can lead to depression, self-loathing, and other traits associated with perfectionism and social anxiety.
Setting Reasonable Expectations
It is human nature to want to aspire to excellence. How do we set reasonable expectations when our perfectionism demands the brass ring? Reasonable expectations that are rational, possible, positive, unconditional, and goal-focused are more likely to be met.
Rational: Of sound judgment; sensible. I will publish my first novel is an unreasonable expectation if we choose to remain illiterate.
Possible: If our expectations are unachievable, our efforts are futile.
Positive: Supporting negative behavior is detrimental to our emotional well-being. It is, likewise, irrational and, therefore, unreasonable to self-harm. Avoid pressure, negative absolute, and conditional words.
Unconditional: Imposing conditions on our expectations decreases the probability of success. Our goal is clear and concise, unimpeded by caveats.
Goal-Focused: If we know our destination, our path will be focused and coherent. The most effective expectations are calculated and specific to our intention. What is our end goal – the personal milestone we want to achieve?
Set Expectations Early On
Setting expectations carefully in advance allows us to preplan strategies and coping mechanisms to help meet them.
Self-Esteem and Other-Esteem
Perfectionists and persons experiencing SAD are subject to significantly lower implicit and explicit self-esteem relative to healthy controls. Latent self-qualities, however, can be regenerated through specific tools and techniques. Healthy self-esteem accelerates and consolidates the structure and effectiveness of reasonable expectations. Rebuilding our self-esteem is a primary objective in recovery and self-empowerment.
Notwithstanding, we can only reasonably set expectations of ourselves. Setting expectations of others will result in frustration and disappointment because we have no control over their outcome. It is called self-esteem, not other-esteem. We only have jurisdiction over internal expectations.
Don’t Beat Yourself Up
No matter how reasonably we set them, occasionally, our expectations will be partially or wholly unmet. We may need to modify them to accommodate the situation. We may need more practice or to extend our planned timeframe. Reasonable expectations require flexibility. While we control our reactions and responses to situations, we are subject to external factors over which we have no control. It is part of the learning process. If we reframe our perspective, we will discover the positive aspects of every experience.
Avoid Distorted Thinking
Perfectionists and persons experiencing social anxiety are highly susceptible to cognitive distortions and other defense mechanisms. Knowing what these are and being mindful of our misuse is essential.
Self-Appreciation
Self-appreciation is recognizing and enjoying our good qualities, efforts, and achievements. For every positive attempt or interaction, congratulate yourself. You deserve to experience the pride and satisfaction that complements such efforts fully. Always be kind to yourself.
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. If we are foolishly determined to fly, our wings will melt and hurdle us to the ground. Recovery, however, is a life’s work in progress. There is no absolute cure for social anxiety, but by practicing the recovery tools and tools over time, we experience an exponential and dramatic moderation of our symptoms.
WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT? ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing neuroscience and psychology including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.
Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.
The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided apply to most emotional malfunctions, including depression, substance abuse, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and self-esteem and motivation issues. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.
“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid, Málaga)
Coping Mechanisms for Social Anxiety
“Success depends upon previous preparation, and without such preparation, there is sure to be a failure.” – Confucius
Social anxiety is culturally identifiable by the persistent fear and avoidance of social interaction and performance situations, which causes us to miss the life experiences that connect us with the world.
Our primary recovery goal is the dramatic moderation of these symptoms. To achieve this, we identify three objectives: To (1) replace or overwhelm our negative thoughts and behaviors with healthy, productive ones, (2) produce rapid neurological stimulation to restructure our neural network, and (3) regenerate our self-esteem.
Coping Strategies versus Coping Mechanisms
Coping strategies are the methods or approaches that best execute our three objectives. In recovery workshops, we emphasize response-focused and solution-focused strategies, but multiple complementary strategies are utilized, including problem and emotion-focused coping strategies that help us manage our response to feared situations.
Coping mechanisms are tools and techniques that implement our strategies. They allow us to temporarily step outside the bullseye to objectively analyze our automatic negative thoughtsand reactions to respond rationally and productively.
In general terms, coping mechanisms help us cope with everyday stress, anxiety, and other negative emotions. They range from practiced skills in recovery (e.g., slow talk, persona, and character focus) to everyday stress reduction like gardening, journaling, and listening to music. Healthy coping mechanisms are adaptive – positive contributions to our emotional well-being.
Decompensation
Without coping mechanisms, healthy or otherwise, we can experience decompensation – the inability to generate effective psychological stress response, resulting in personality disturbance or disintegration.
Defense Mechanisms
Defense mechanisms are temporary safeguards against situations that challenge our conscious minds. They are automatic psychological responses designed to protect us from our fears/anxieties. Notwithstanding their label, many defense mechanisms support recovery when utilized appropriately.
Cognitive distortions are common defense mechanisms. CDs are exaggerated or irrational thought patterns that perpetuate our anxiety and depression. They interpret experiences in ways that don’t represent reality. We twist it to reinforce or justify our toxic behaviors and validate our destructive thoughts and conduct.
Any process that protects us from our fears, anxieties, and threats to our emotional well-being is a defense mechanism. Some, like avoidance, humor, and isolation, require no explanation. Others, such as compensation and dissociation, have positive and negative values.
Situations
A situation is a set of circumstances – the facts, conditions, and incidents affecting us at a particular time in a particular place. A feared situation provokes fears/anxieties that negatively impact our activities and associations.
Two Types of Situations
Two types of situations concern us. Anticipated situations are those that we know, in advance, will provoke our fears/anxieties. They can be one-off situations like a job interview or social event. They can be recurring situations like the classroom or our daily work environment.
Unexpected situations catch us by surprise—stress-provoking incidents impacting our daily lives such as faulty plumbing, an unexpected guest, or losing a wallet.
Automatic Negative Thoughts areimmediate, involuntary expressions of our fears/anxieties. They can occur prior to, during, or after a feared situation. ANTs are terse emotional responses, unbased upon reason and deliberation. They are the unpleasant expressions of our negative self-beliefs that define who we are, who we think we are, and who we think others think we are.
We first determine the fear-provoking situation to Identify our fears/anxieties and corresponding ANTs. Where are we when we feel anxious or apprehensive, and what activities are involved? What are we thinking? What might we be doing? Who and what do we avoid because of these insecure feelings?
We then unpack our associated fears/anxieties. We ask ourselves the following: What is problematic in the situation? How do I feel (physically, intellectually, emotionally, spiritually)? What is my specific concern or worry? What is the worst thing that could happen to me? What might happen to me?
The next step is unmasking our corresponding automatic negative thoughts, e.g., “I am incompetent.” “No one will talk to me.” “I will do something stupid.” “I am a loser.”
Examining and analyzing this information allows us to generate rational responses to our fears/anxieties and corresponding ANTs, which are not factual but subjective abstractions.
Moderating Our Fears/Anxieties and ANTs
In anticipated situations, we have the luxury of preplanning strategies to address our fears/anxieties and ANTs. For unexpected situations, assembling an emergency preparedness kit of practiced coping mechanisms is prudent and helpful.
Coping mechanisms are valuable tools in the recovery process. Their role is to moderate the negative stimuli within the situation, allowing us to de-stress and reframe our responses. Our apprehensions adversely impact our ability to concentrate. Additionally, we are hampered by our negative self-appraisal and the influx of stress-provoking hormones.
We develop and practice more detailed coping mechanisms in a workshop environment. Introspection, collective activities, and graded exposure are helpful to the client in determining the mechanisms that are most individually effective and adaptable.
Know the Enemy
Did you ever try to talk to someone about your social anxiety? It’s hard. Like it’s some alien disease or something. Nobody gets it. That is why we are reluctant to disclose it. Many of us deliberately choose to remain ignorant of SAD’s destructive capabilities. Others pretend it doesn’t exist or ignore it, hoping it will disappear or no one will notice. Our resistance is a significant impediment to our recovery.
It is disconcerting how many socially anxious clients are unfamiliar with SAD’s causes, symptoms, and impact. The information is readily available.When we have the sniffles, we dash to the internet and familiarize ourselves with every snake oil remedy known to civilization. Nevertheless, despite experiencing social anxiety for decades, it remains as mysterious to us as the eating habits of the Loch Ness Monster.
It is essential to know the symptoms of our condition and how they impact us. To paraphrase Sun Tzu, our chances of recovery are negligible if we neither know the enemy nor ourselves. It is pointless to attempt to assemble a puzzle if the pieces are missing.
Rational Response
A rational response is a logical, self-affirming counter to our fears/anxieties and ANTs. For example, if we fear criticism and negative judgment, rational responses might be, “I belong here as much as anyone,” “I am valuable and significant,” and “I am equal to anyone here.”
Positive personal affirmations focus on general aspects of our condition. We devise rational responses to rebut the automatic negative thoughts that correspond to our situational fears/anxieties. Rational responses challenge stressful incidents that impact us at a particular time in a particular place. Essentially, rational responses are intellectual evaluations of our emotional angst.
Reframe Your Perspective
Reframing is identifying and resolving negative emotions and situations by changing our perspective on how we experience and respond to them. Positive reframing is turning a negative perspective into a positive one. Reframing addresses our negativity in general, while rational response focuses on our feared situation. Positively reframing adverse experiences, events, thoughts, and behaviors as an opportunity to challenge them supports both processes. As we progress in recovery, both positive reframing and rational response ostensibly become habitual and automatic. Experts agree that positive reframing is critical for emotional well-being.
Seek Progress, Not Perfection
SAD persons worry about their performance before and during a situation and obsess about the outcome long after. We fear criticism and negative appraisal. We set unreasonable expectations to compensate for our perceptions of incompetence and inadequacy, and then we beat ourselves up when our expectations are unmet. Perfectionismis not the desire to do well but the need to be faultless. Anything less is unsatisfactory. Perfectionism and social anxiety have a parallel relationship.
Recovery, however, is a life’s work in progress. There is no absolute cure for social anxiety, but with work and over time, we experience a dramatic and exponential moderation of our symptoms. The key is progress over perfection.
Set Reasonable Expectations
An expectation, by definition, is afervid belief that something will take place in the future. When we set expectations, we invest a strong interest in their outcome. What happens in the likelihood that our expectations are unmet? Because we have a vested interest, we are psychologically attached to the outcome. Fixed In our minds, we set it as a reality. When it does not go our way, the general response is one of disappointment.
Experts describe the reaction to disappointment as a form of sadness – an expression of desperation or grief due to loss. While it is true that we cannot lose what we have not acquired, fixing the expectation in our mind makes it real and visceral. Loss leads to depression, self-loathing, and other traits associated with perfectionism and social anxiety.
Engender Joy and Laughter
The endorphins and chemical hormones transmitted with positive emotions dramatically enhance our psychological well-being. Joy and laughter counteract stress and defuse anger, resentment, and shame. Theystrengthen our immune system,boost energy levels, and enhance memory and concentration. When we smile and laugh, the influx of our fear and anxiety-provoking hormones decreases. Finding humor in stressful situations reframes our perspective, takes the edge off our anxiety, and helps us take things less seriously. It provides a sense of shared community, which helps counter our fear and avoidance of intimacy and social events, improving our psychological health.
Remember, We Are Not Alone
Roughly 124 million U.S. adults and adolescents experience anxiety disorders. 60% of those have depression, and many resort to substance abuse. Others experiencing SAD are too preoccupied with their center of attention to seek us out for judgment or criticism. At least two of five people in any situation are just as apprehensive as we are, if not more so. So, when we worry and hyperventilate at a social event, we are in good company. Social anxiety is common, universal, and indiscriminate. We are never alone.
Avoid Non-Productive Situations
A primary SAD symptom is our intense fear or anxiety during social situations, causing us to avoid interacting with others. Human interconnectivity, however, is essential for emotional health. Turning down opportunities to socialize exacerbates our isolation, and we continue to miss possibilities for intimacy and friendship. In recovery, we gradually expose ourselves to situations that can engender positive social interaction.
This, however, does not mean that we need to challenge every situation. There is a distinction between avoiding out of fear and avoiding out of reason. One workshop exercise is to initiate a salutation or small talk with a stranger. Discretion about who and where we engage is important. Another example is the socially anxious individual with an arts degree attending a conference for chemical engineers. Avoidance is not only reasonable but also evident.
Remember, You Are Not Alone
Roughly, 124 million U.S. adults and adolescents experience anxiety disorders. 60% of those have depression, and many resort to substance abuse. Persons experiencing SAD are too preoccupied with their own center of attention to seek us out for judgment or criticism. At least two of five people in any situation are just as apprehensive as we are, if not more so. So, when we worry and start to hyperventilate at a social event, we are in good company. Social anxiety is common, universal, and indiscriminate. We are never alone.
Emergency Preparedness Kit
Knowing how to respond effectively to unexpected situations is challenging. When dealing with a scheduled event or one that meets regularly, we have the wherewithal to plan accordingly. Strategizing for unanticipated situations is somewhat of a crap shoot. Accordingly, we assemble an emergency preparedness kit of practiced coping mechanisms that can be effective in any feared situation.
General Coping Strategies
Controlled Breathing
Controlled breathing reduces stress, increases our mental awareness, and boosts our immune system. Scientific studies show that this simple grounding technique helps moderate symptoms associated with anxiety, depression, and other stress-related conditions. Grounding distracts from negative stimuli by focusing on the present through our body and senses. It helps us manage our negative thoughts and reactions.
Our vagus nerve controls our heart rate and nervous system. It also manages our fight-or-flight response. Science tells us that the simplest way to manipulate our vagus nerveis to practice controlled breathing, which decreases the flow of cortisol, adrenaline, and norepinephrine while releasing mood and memory-enhancing chemical hormones like GABA and serotonin.
Positive Personal Affirmations
Positive personal affirmations are self-motivating and empowering statements that help us focus on goals, challenge negative, self-defeating beliefs, and reprogram our subconscious minds. We drastically underestimate the significance and effectiveness of PPAs because we need to understand their neuroscience. Providing all the neural benefits of positive reinforcement, our PPAs self-describe who and what we aspire to be in our emotional development. PPAs are rational, reasonable, possible, positive, unconditional, problem-focused, brief, and in first-person present or future time. Think of positive personal affirmations as aspirations or self-fulfilling prophecies that, through deliberate repetition, help replace our abundance of negative neural information with healthy, productive input.
Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR)
PMR is another grounding technique. We progressively relax our muscle groups, beginning with the lower extremities and extending to the forehead. Like controlled breathing, there are long and short applications. Abbreviated PMR takes less than a minute and can be executed surreptitiously during any situation. This coping mechanism relieves the discomforting muscle tension aggravated by stress. It also reduces the influx of our fear and anxiety-provoking hormones while momentarily distracting us from our negative thoughts and reactions.
Slow Talk
Our anxiety often compels us to mumble or rush our speaking under pressure. Slow talk is deliberately speaking slowly and calmly. It slows our physiological responses, alleviates rapid heartbeat, and lowers our blood pressure. It is also helpful to incorporate the 5-second rule, i.e., pause any response for five thoughtful seconds. Not only does this coping mechanism moderate the flow of cortisol, adrenaline, and other stress-provoking hormones, but it also presents the appearance of someone thoughtful and confident.
Coping Mechanisms for Anticipated Situations
Knowing our feared situation in advance gives us ample opportunity to devise a structured plan to counter our fears/anxieties. In providing rational responses to our negative emotional stimuli, we identify the feared situation, associated fears/anxieties, and corresponding ANTs. From there, we devise our rational responses by reframing the negative self-appraisal of our ANTs.
We develop a structured plan utilizing situationally focused coping mechanisms in a workshop environment. We practice the strategy in non-threatening simulations. This method is called graded exposure – systematic desensitization consisting of thought and behavioral modification techniques that reduce our sensitivity to feared situations.
When we feel adequately prepared, we expose ourselves to the feared situation.
In addition to the coping mechanisms already outlined, situationally specific coping mechanisms include the following:
Affirmative Visualization
An affirmative visualization is a positive outcome scenario we mentally create by imagining or visualizing it. All information passes through our brain’s thalamus, which makes no distinction between inner and outer realities. Whether we visualize doing something or actually do it, we stimulate the same regions of our neural network. Visualizing raising our left hand is, to our brain, the same thing as physically raising our left hand and produces the same neural benefits.
Affirmative visualization activates our dopaminergic-reward system, decreasing the neurotransmissions of anxiety and fear-provoking hormones and accelerating and consolidating the beneficial ones. When we visualize, our brain generates alpha waves, which can reduce the symptoms of anxiety and depression.
Research shows that visualizing a situation in advance improves our mental and physical performance. We consciously source information that will enhance our performance outcomes, dramatically improving the likelihood of success in the actual situation.
Character Focus
Focusing on our character strengths, virtues, attributes, and achievements channels our emotional angst to mental deliberation, disparaging our fears/anxieties and corresponding ANTs. It supports the regeneration of our self-esteem as we rebuild our latent self-qualities. By manifesting our character strengths and achievements, we reframe our perspective, empowering our assets and generating renewed self-confidence and viability.
Distractions/Diversions
A distraction is another grounding technique that momentarily channels our attention away from our fears/anxieties. Also called directed attention, we focus on specific sensations, items, or activities to supersede moments of stress and discomfort in our feared situation. These physical and mental distractions temporarily remove us from our fears/anxieties and help us manage our negative thoughts and reactions. Snapping a rubber band on our wrist to momentarily ground our attention is a prime example of a distraction.
Persona
Our persona is the social face we present to our exposure situation(s), designed to make a focused impression while concealing the visibility of our social anxiety. We have multiple personas. We present differently depending upon the context of the situation, e.g., a sports event versus an interview for a job or a family dinner versus a fraternity bash.
A static or negative persona (e.g., SAD-induced) inhibits our psychological development. A strong sense of self-esteem relates to the outside world through flexible personas adaptable to different situations. Establishing a persona is similar to an actor preparing for a role. While we may employ new mannerisms, a different stride, or attitude, a persona is not another self. It is an affectation – a novel rendering of our personality. It is also a formidable distraction.
Projected Positive Outcome
Our projected positive outcome is the reasonable expectations we set for our feared situation. We already know the projected negative outcome if we capitulate to our ANTs. Therefore, we rationally respond by setting reasonable expectations. A sensible projected positive outcome is rational, practical, and doable to ensure success. For example, expecting to be immediately hired with a fantastic salary at a networking event is not a reasonable expectation. Making an initial and fruitful contact is a more reasonable projected positive outcome.
Purpose
Purpose is the primary motivation behind our exposure to a situation. What do we seek or hope to accomplish? Why are we exposing ourselves? If the situation is the barbershop or beauty salon (not uncommon sources of anxiety), it is reasonable to consider that our purpose is get our hair cut or styled. It may be something else, however. Purpose is a subjective determination.
Attending a social event offers multiple purposes. We may want to network, make friends, and seek an intimate relationship. Maintaining numerous purposes reduces the probability of success, leading to disappointment and self-recrimination. Therefore, we redefine and focus on one purpose and set reasonable expectations. To paraphrase a Russian proverb: if you chase two pigs, you have less chance of catching either one.
Small Talk
Small talk is an informal greeting, comment, or discourse absent any functional topic of conversation or transaction. In essence, it is polite, non-confrontational verbal interaction meant to acknowledge presence and or open channels of further communication. This activity is not as easy for those experiencing social anxiety as it appears. In interactive workshop activities, graded exposure defines the parameters and establishes the comfort zone critical to successful small talk.
SUDS Rating and Projected SUDS Rating
The Subjective Units of Distress Scale ranges from 0 to 100, measuring the severity of our situational fears/anxieties. Additionally, it allows us to set reasonable expectations of success. We evaluate what level of distress we anticipate in our feared situation (SUDS Rating) and what we project it will be upon its successful completion (Projected SUDS Rating). Again, we set reasonable expectations. A moderate projected SUDS rating will offer the probability of a successful venture. For example, if our SUDS rating of distress for making a presentation is 80, a reasonable projected SUDS rating might be 70 or 75. Projecting a 10 SUDS rating would imply that we expect a standing ovation and a national speaking tour. It’s possible, but it is an unreasonable expectation.
These coping mechanisms are specialized and focused on responding to expected and unanticipated feared situations. Exposing ourselves to a feared situation without a strategy and functional coping mechanisms is jumping out of an airplane without a parachute. In the words of a master of moderation, Benjamin Franklin, “Failing to Plan is Planning to Fail.”
Coping Mechanisms for Everyday Stress
Anything that takes us out of the stress of the moment qualifies as an adaptive coping mechanism. From listening to music to tending a garden, coping mechanisms are as numerous and varied as individual experience and imagination.
To iterate, some will work for us, and others we will discard. Some will work sometimes and not at other times. Most are general activities like exercise, meditation, and creativity. The key is to become mindful when a pursuit helps us unwind from our anxieties and apprehensions and utilize them when the stressful occasion arises. Examples of coping mechanisms for everyday stress include:
Arts and Crafts: Pottery, knitting, photography, scrapbooks, candle and jewelry making.
Music: Soundscapes, chants, and ambient music can be restful and motivating; sound therapy therapeutic; and emotionally supportive music and songs stimulate the positive flow of chemical hormones.
Creative Pursuits: produce videos, write, read, play an instrument, visit a museum.
Connecting with nature reduces anger, fear, and stress and increases pleasant feelings while contributing to our physical well-being, lowering blood pressure, heart rate, muscle tension, and the production of stress hormones. Spending time in nature is linked to both cognitive benefits and mood and emotional well-being improvements.
Personal Time: Take a relaxing bath, cuddle with the family pet, spend time with friends, colleagues, and family, fun shopping.
Physical Activity: Dancing, jogging, swimming, yoga, the gym.
Body Relaxation: Tapping, acupuncture, meditation, massage, autogenic relaxation.
Self-Empowering: Gratitude list, journaling, self-compassion, volunteering, random acts of kindness.
Coping mechanisms are tools and techniques with a wide range of uses. They assist in moderating our situational fears/anxieties and ANTs. They temporarily allow us to step outside the bullseye to objectively analyze our perceptions and reactions and respond rationally and productively. They also help us cope with everyday stress, anxiety, and other negative emotions.
WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT? ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing neuroscience and psychology including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.
Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.
The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided are applicable to most emotional malfunctions including depression, substance abuse, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and issues of self-esteem and motivation. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.
The Value of Testimonials
Social anxiety disorder is ostensibly the most underrated and misunderstood psychological affliction. It is culturally identifiable by the persistent fear and avoidance of social interaction and performance situations, which causes us to miss the life experiences that connect us with the world.
Nicknamed the neglected anxiety disorder, SAD is routinely misdiagnosed. Few professionals understand it, and even fewer want to deal with it. Experts cite the mental health community’s difficulty distinguishing its symptoms and identifying specific etiological risk factors.
The primary goal of recovery from social anxiety is the moderation of our irrational fears and anxieties. This is best achieved through a three-pronged approach: To (1) replace or overwhelm our negative thoughts and behaviors with healthy, productive ones, (2) produce rapid, neurological stimulation to change the polarity of our neural network, and (3) regenerate our self-esteem. These comprise our overall strategy. It is a measured but complex strategy.
Consequently, one-size-fits-all approaches are inefficient. Recovery must consider the diversity of human thought and experience. That calls for a collaboration of neuroscience, philosophy, and psychology. Philosophy, existentially defined, welcomes religious and spiritual insight. Additionally, individual environments, heritage, experiences, and associations reflect our wants, choices, and aspirations. If they are not given consideration, then we are not valued.
Listening to and sharing the experiences and expertise of others broadens our perspective and understanding. Many of the ideas that eventually become an integral part of recovery come from the thoughts and contributions of colleagues and clients in our groups and workshops. Furthermore, by supplementing our workshops, posts, and publications with innovative and evolving ideas, opinions, and experiences, we better serve the community by providing a full and comprehensive overview of emotional malfunction and methods of recovery.
Client testimonials provide a narrow but measured perspective on how well we are listening and meeting our objectives.
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“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI—deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice(Valencia, Málaga, Madrid)
“One of the most difficult things for those of us with social anxiety is to take the leap to join a recovery program. Dr. Mullen’s Social Anxiety Workshop has been a tremendous help for me in getting back control of my anxiety. The weekly workshops are tailored to the individual(s) learning style, and comfortability, so there was never a time I felt in over my head. It was not always easy work, but with Dr. Mullen’s positivity, compassion, and encouragement, I can say it is one of the best investments I have made in myself, and I will continue to improve and benefit from it for the rest of my life.” – Nick P. (Workshop Graduate)
I have never encountered such an efficient professional … His work transpires dedication, care, and love for what he does.” – Jose Garcia Silva, PhD, composer of Cosmos
“I would like to say thank you for a well-organized learning experience. I can’t tell you how much I really appreciate this program. I feel so confident and ready to utilize these resources/tools you’ve provided.” – Trish D.(Workshop Graduate)
“Thank you so much! I’m so excited! I really need this.” – Kelsey D. (Group Member)
“I’ve lived with social anxiety for decades. I spent many years (and thousands of dollars) on conventional talk therapy, self-help books, and medication, without experiencing any real change or relief. ReChanneling’s Social Anxiety Workshop produced results within a few sessions, with continuing improvement throughout the workshop and beyond. I’m now much more at ease in situations that were major sources of anxiety and avoidance for me just a few months ago. The shared experience of working through social anxiety with other people who “get it” is powerful … Dr. Mullen is truly committed to our growth and recovery.” – Liz D. (Workshop Graduate)
“A leading expert on social anxiety disorder and its comorbidities, Dr. Mullen is the father of proactive neuroplasticity.” – Lake Shore Unitarian Society, Winnetka, IL
“It is refreshing to work with an organization that possesses sincere commitment, ethics, and genuinely cares about its clients.” – Sharon Hoery & Associates, Colorado
“I attended the online recovery workshop. Dr. Mullen is considered a leading expert on anxiety and depression, etc. If you want to regain your sense of self-worth and confidence, you may want to consider recovery. It’s a bit of work but well worth the effort.” – Matty S. (Workshop Graduate)
“Dr. Mullen hits the nail on the head with ReChanneling.” – Reverend Richard Carlini
“I like Robert’s SAD recovery program, especially how it’s taking many of my negative thoughts away and replacing them with positive ones. I also appreciate the others that are in our recovery group, as we all mingle quite well. And, of course, Robert is always there as nurturing and positive friend.” – Michael Z.(Workshop Graduate)
“I love his classes because the only pressure comes from within, not from the instructor, who clearly loves and knows what he is doing.” – Leon V. (Workshop Graduate)
“I am simply in awe at the writing, your insights, your deep knowing of transcendence, your intuitive understanding of psychic-physical pain, your connection of the pain to healing, your concept/title, and above all, your innate compassion.” – Janice Parker, PhD
“I do see the light at the end of the tunnel and that’s something I didn’t have before the workshop. As far as I’m concerned, that pretty much says it all.” – David C. (Workshop Graduate)
WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT? ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing neuroscience and psychology including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.
Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.
The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided are applicable to most emotional malfunctions including depression, substance abuse, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and issues of self-esteem and motivation. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.
Positive Personal Affirmations
“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid, Málaga)
The positive thinker sees the invisible, feels the intangible, and achieves the impossible.” – Winston Churchill
Positive personal affirmations (PPAs) are self-empowering, motivating statements of purpose that we repeat to ourselves to challenge our negative self-beliefs. Executing them repeatedly is one of the more efficient means of neural restructuring. Additionally, the power of suggestion supports the replacement of our toxic thoughts and helps regenerate our self-esteem.
In defining his counteroffensive in war, Sun Tzu wrote, “Supreme excellence consists of breaking the enemy’s resistance without fighting.” That is what we are doing with the deliberate, repetitive neural input (DRNI) of our PPAs. By barraging our brain with positive information, we are breaking down its resistance to healthy thoughts and behaviors due to our life-consistent negative self-beliefs.
Executing PPAs properly initiatestherapid, concentrated, neurological stimulation that causes positive neural chain reactions. PPAs are the most effective way to accelerate and consolidate proactive neuroplasticity. Additionally, PNPs help us focus on goals, challenge negative, self-defeating beliefs, and reprogram our subconscious minds.
Consequently, the three Rs of recovery – restructuring, replacing, and regenerating are satisfied.
Why We Dismiss PPAs
So, why do we resist executing this very elementary coping mechanism? Client interviews with persons recovering from emotional malfunction reveal a curious resistance to carrying out the simple task of implementing PPAs. Mindful of their value, we consistently fail to take advantage. Additionally, we rarely have a rational explanation.
So, let us discuss some reasons for our reticence.
Negativity Bias and Cognitive Bias
Humans are hard-wired with a negativity bias and inherently respond more favorably to adversity. Additionally, we have been inundated with SAD-provoked unhealthy thoughts and behaviors since adolescent onset. Our negative core and intermediate beliefs produce a cognitive bias that compels us to misinterpret information and make irrational decisions. PPAs, by definition, are positive manifestations that naturally conflict with our emotional trajectory.
Many of us disparage the new-age implications of PPAs. Even with recognition, comprehension, and acceptance of their benefits toward positive neural realignment, we find them silly and pretentious. Likewise, their 2000-year history in tantras and prayer compels us to dismiss them as archaic and impotent.
SAD is ostensibly the most underrated and misunderstood disorder. Its complexity disputes the effectiveness of simple and uncomplicated solutions. How can anything this straightforward contribute significantly to the restructuring of our neural network?
The calculated regimen of deliberate, repetitive, neural information is not only tedious but also fails to deliver immediate tangible results, causing us to readily concede defeat and abandon hope in this era of instant gratification.
SAD drives us to disparage unfamiliar ideas and concepts. Our resistance to recovery and its tools and techniques is robust. Remember, humans are physiologically averse to change. We are hard-wired to resist anything that jeopardizes our status quo. Our brain’s inertia senses and repels change, and our basal ganglia resist any modification to behavior patterns.
Finally, since childhood, we have been badgered by parents and other influencers to think positively. However, they rarely considered the supporting scientific evidence. Cajoling someone to do something without explanation is like teaching a puppy to walk on its hind legs. It eventually learns, but only under duress, and probably resents its trainer. It is not self-motivated and does not perform without an audience.
In the wise words of Leonardo da Vinci, “Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Being willing is not enough; we must do.”
On the surface, creating PPAs sounds easy, but it is deceptively complex for SAD persons. It is challenging to grasp how years of negative self-beliefs are compensated by a few choice words. Our brains, however, do not think. They are neural reciprocators. Therefore, the intent and input of positive neural information compensate for our low implicit and explicit self-esteem.
That’s why mindfulness of the science behind proactive neuroplasticity is so important. If our PPAs meet the criteria for good information, our neural network will recognize them and restructure accordingly, whether we believe our information or not.
Power of Suggestion
Additionally, the power of suggestion instigates positive changes in our thoughts and behaviors. Psychology attributes it to our ‘response expectancies,’ or what I refer to as self-fulfilling prophecies. Response expectancies refer to our anticipation of a positive response. Similar to affirmative visualizations, PPAs are positive outcome scenarios that we mentally imagine or visualize.
All information passes through our thalamus – the small structure located just above the stem between the cerebral cortex and the midbrain. It has extensive nerve connections to both. By visualizing activity, we increase activity in the thalamus and our brain responds as though the activity is really happening. Our thalamus makes no distinction between inner and outer realities. Visualizing raising our left hand is, to our brain, the same thing as physically raising our left hand.
Any idea or suggestion, if contemplated solidly, will take on a semblance of reality. If we visualize a solution to a problem, the problem begins to resolve itself because visualizing activates the cognitive circuits involved with our working memory.
Neural Wiring
Neurons don’t act by themselves but through neural circuits that strengthen or weaken their connections based on electrical activity. The deliberate, repetitive, neural input of information from PPAs compels neurons to fire repeatedly, causing them to wire together. The more repetitions, the more robust the new connections.
Hebbian Learning
Neuroscientist Donald Hebb pioneered the correlation between psychology and neuroscience as it relates to behavior. Hebbian Learning is a complex algorithm that is best summarized as “neurons that fire together wire together.” That means the simultaneous activation of nearby neurons leads to an increase in the strength of synaptic connections between them. While our input of information is not simultaneous, the corresponding reactivity of participating neurons produces the same response. PPAs accelerate and consolidate learning by causing neural circuits to strengthen and forward information.
Neural Reciprocation
Multiple repetitions of positive information activate millions of neurons that reciprocate that energy in abundance. Like any neural input of information, PPAs spark receptor neurons that forward positive energy to millions of participating neurons, causing a cellular chain reaction in multiple interconnected areas. Remember, our brain doesn’t distinguish healthy from toxic information. Positive information in, positive energy reciprocated in abundance. Conversely, negative information in, negative energy reciprocated in abundance. Thus, the value of positive information.
Three PPAs repeated five times, three times daily generates forty-five cellular chain reactions, dramatically accelerating and consolidating the restructuring of our neural network. The process takes approximately five minutes out of our day.
Cortisol and Adrenaline
PPAs decrease the flow of the fear and anxiety-provoking hormones, cortisol and adrenaline while simultaneously producing hormones for memory, learning, and concentration. Scientists have identified over fifty chemical hormones in the human body. They are the messengers that control our physiological functions – our metabolism, homeostasis, and reproduction. Their distribution is precise. Even slight changes in levels can cause significant disruption to our health as in the cases of cortisol, adrenaline, and other fight or flight-inducing hormones.
Cortisol and adrenaline are called fear and anxiety-provoking hormones. Under stress, our amygdala signals our hypothalamus and sympathetic nervous control systems in the brain stem. The hypothalamus, in turn, alerts our cortisol and adrenaline hormones. This stress-related trajectory is stored in our physiological memory bank and the more the process is repeated, the more we are negatively impacted by these hormones.
Chronic stress induced by our SAD symptomatology causes a higher, more constant influx of cortisol and adrenaline into our system. Not only does this increase the risk of health problems like heart disease and stroke, but it contributes significantly to our anxiety and depression, causing problems with memory, cognition, and sleep patterns. PPAs help reduce the influx of these neural transmissions.
Other Benefits
The deliberate, repetitive, neural input of information also activates long-term potentiation, which increases the strength of the nerve impulses along the connecting pathways, generating more energy. Additionally, PPAs amplify the activity of our axon pathways, creating higher levels of BDNF (brain-derived neural factor) proteins. We accelerate learning and unlearning through deliberate repetition.
Criteria for Robust PPAs
The most effective PPAs are constructed using the following seven criteria.
Rational: Our objective is to subvert the irrationality of our negative self-beliefs. It is illogical to cause ourselves harm. Irrationality is self-destructive because it subverts the truth.
Reasonable: Of sound judgment; sensible. I will publish my first novel is an unreasonable expectation if we choose to remain illiterate.
Possible: If our goals are impossible, our efforts are counter-productive and futile. I will win a Grammy is not a viable option to the tone-deaf.
Unconditional: Placing limitations on our commitment by using words like maybe, might, and perhaps is our unconscious avoidance of accountability. Saying I might do something essentially means we may or may not do something depending upon our mood or disposition. How comfortable are we when someone says, I might consider paying you for your work?
Goal-Focused: If we do not know our destination, our path will be unfocused and meandering.
First-Person, Present Time: The past is immutable, the future indeterminate. Our actions can only happen in the present.
Brevity: Direct and easily memorized.
The most effective PPAs are calculated and specific to our intention. Are we challenging the negative thoughts and behaviors of our social anxiety? Are we reaffirming the character strengths and virtues that support recovery and transformation? Are we focused on a specific challenge? What is our end goal – the personal milestone we want to achieve?
The process of proactive neuroplasticity is theoretically simple but challenging, due to the commitment and endurance required for the long-term, repetitive process. We do not don tennis shorts and advance to Wimbledon without decades of practice with rackets and balls; philharmonics cater to pianists who have spent years at the keyboard.
As described earlier, neural restructuring requires a calculated regimen of deliberate, repetitive, neural information that is not only tedious but also fails to deliver immediate tangible results. Fortunately, the universal law of compensation anticipates this. The positive impact of PPAs is exponential due to the abundant reciprocation of positive energy, the neural benefits, and the transmissions of hormones that accelerate and consolidate learning.
WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT? ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing neuroscience and psychology including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.
Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.
“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid Málaga)
Here are some of ReChanneling’s activities through the spring and summer.
New Saturday Workshop
Due to multiple requests and the overflow for our current workshop, we have scheduled an additional social anxiety recovery workshop for Saturday mornings.
VIDEO #8 in our Proactive Neuroplasticity series
Social Anxiety: It’s Not Your Fault
We are editing the eighth video installment on Proactive Neuroplasticity. The YouTube video will also be viewed on LinkedIn, Twitter, Facebook, BitChute, ReChanneling.org, and Regimed Pharmacy,
We are currently editing with Springer Publications our upcoming book, tentatively titled The War for our Emotional Well-Being. Recovery from Social Anxiety and Other Emotional Malfunctions. Prior to publication, we will enlist support and criticism from our peers at Academia.edu and ResearchGate. We appreciate the excellent support from individuals who commented on our website postings that are drafts of what is transcribed into the book.
The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity, and references to one include the other. The tools and techniques provided in this book focus on social anxiety but are applicable to most emotional malfunctions, including depression, substance abuse, panic disorder, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and self-esteem and motivational issues. They originate uniformly, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.
Statistics
Dr. Mullen’s publications are viewed worldwide. Academia.edu and ResearchGate claim roughly 1,000 academic readers, and Google Scholar reports 31 citations in books and journals. ReChanneling’s website, YouTube, and other sources (not including social media) have been accessed over 25,000 times.
All of Dr. Mullen’s chapters and articles, including “Utilizing Psychobiography to Moderate Symptoms of Social Anxiety Disorder,” “The Extraordinariness of the ‘Ordinary’ Extraordinary,” and “EnlistingPositive Psychologies to Challenge Love within SAD’s Culture of Maladaptive Self-Beliefs” are available upon request. Contact us.
(3/20/25 ) APA Western Division Conference, Portland
Schedules for upcoming workshops and presentations are provided on ReChanneling’s website.
Some Testimonials
“I like Robert’s SAD recovery program, especially how it’s taking many of my negative thoughts away and replacing them with positive ones. I also appreciate the others that are in our recovery group, as we all mingle quite well. And, of course, Robert is always there as nurturing and positive friend.” – Michael Z.
“I have never encountered such an efficient professional … His work transpires dedication, care, and love for what he does.” – Jose Garcia Silva, PhD, Composer Cosmos
“I am simply in awe at the writing, your insights, your deep knowing of transcendence, your intuitive understanding of psychic-physical pain, your connection of the pain to healing … and above all, your innate compassion.” – Jan Parker, PhD
“A leading expert on social anxiety disorder and its comorbidities, Dr. Mullen is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity, enabled by the deliberate, repetitive, neural input of information (DRNI).” Lakeshore Unitarian Society
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WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT? ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing neuroscience and psychology including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.
Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.
The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided are applicable to most emotional malfunctions including depression, substance abuse, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and issues of self-esteem and motivation. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.
“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid Málaga)
Emotional Malfunction: Why Me?
“Maybe the journey isn’t so much about becoming anything. Maybe it is about un-becoming everything that isn’t really you, so you can be who you were meant to be in the first place.” – Paul Coelho
Our condition emanates from childhood disturbance. Subsequent self-disapproving core beliefs inform our intermediate beliefs. These are adversely impacted by the adolescent onset of our emotional malfunction. Fostered by our inherent negativity bias, unwholesome thoughts and behaviors flourish throughout our adulthood, disrupting our emotional well-being and quality of life.
Social anxiety disorder and comorbidities compel us to view ourselves as helpless, hopeless, undesirable, and worthless. Like proverbial wandering lambs, we expose our flanks to the wolves of irrationality. We feel helpless, hopeless, undesirable, and worthless. That is how our malfunction sustains itself.
The trajectory of our negative thoughts and behaviors is not perfectly linear but is a collaboration of complementary and overlapping stages. Complementarity describes how a unit can only function optimally if its components work effectively and in concert. Our social anxiety functions optimally because it is sustained by our negative core and intermediate beliefs, influenced by childhood disturbance and the onset of our disorder. All these attributions are considered in recovery albeit the causes are not as important as the solution.
Our trajectory begins with our core beliefs – the deeply held convictions that determine how we see ourselves in the world. We formulate them in childhood in response to information, experiences, inferences and deductions, and by accepting what we are told as true. They mold the unquestioned underlying themes that govern our assumptions and, ostensibly, remain as our belief system throughout life. When we decline to question our core beliefs, we act upon them as though they are real and true.
Core beliefs are more rigid in SAD persons because we tend to store information consistent with negative beliefs, ignoring evidence that contradicts it. This produces a cognitive bias – a subconscious error in thinking that leads us to misinterpret information, impacting the accuracy of our perspectives and decisions. That is different from our inherent negativity bias, which is the human tendency to prioritize negative stimuli and past negative events and situations.
Childhood Disturbance
During the development of our core beliefs, we are subject to a childhood disturbance, be it accidental, intentional, real, or imagined. Childhood disturbance is a broad and generic term for anything that interferes with our optimal physical, cognitive, emotional, or social development.
These disturbances are universal and indiscriminate. Cumulative evidence that a toxic childhood is a primary causal factor in lifetime emotional insecurity and instability has been well-established.
Negative Core Beliefs
Childhood disturbance generates negative core beliefs about the self. Feelings of abandonment, detachment, neglect, and exploitation are common consequences of childhood disturbance. These generate negative core beliefs about the self and others.
Self-oriented negative core beliefs compel us to view ourselves as inconsequential and insignificant. This generates self-blaming for our perceived inadequacies and incompetence.
Our other-oriented negative core beliefs cause us to define others as demeaning, dismissive, malicious, and manipulative. This allows us to blame others for our condition, avoiding personal accountability. It also rationalizes our fears of interconnectivity and avoidance of social situations.
Emotional Malfunction
The next stage in our trajectory is the onset of our emotional malfunction which corresponds with our developing intermediate beliefs. Roughly 90% of disorder onset happens during adolescence, albeit the manifestation of symptoms often occurs later in life. SAD infects around the age of thirteen due to a combination of genetic and environmental factors. Researchers recently discovered a specific serotonin transporter gene called “SLC6A4” that is strongly correlated with SAD. Nonetheless, the susceptibility to onset originates in childhood.
Disturbance, negative core beliefs, and onset generate low implicit and explicit self-esteem and heavily influence our intermediate beliefs.
Insufficient Satisfaction of Needs
Self-esteem is mindfulness of our value to ourselves, society, and the world. It can be further understood as a complex interrelationship between how we think about ourselves, how we think others perceive us, and how we process and present that information.
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs reveals how childhood disturbance disrupts our natural development. The orderly flow of social and emotional development requires satisfying fundamental human needs. Childhood disturbance and negative core beliefs subvert certain biological, physiological, and emotional needs like familial support, healthy relationships, and a sense of safety and belongingness. This lacuna negatively dramatically impacts our self-esteem which we express by our undervaluation or regression of our positive self-qualities.
A quick note regarding mindfulness. The concept of mindfulness is essential to recovery and used throughout. However, there is appreciable ambiguity when it comes to defining it. For our purposes, it means recognizing, understanding, and accepting the veracity of something. If we understand a concept or theory about something but don’t believe it is true or valid, then we are not being mindful. Likewise, if we recognize the concept but don’t understand it, then we are still left in the dark.
Negative Intermediate Beliefs
The onset of SAD happens during the development of our intermediate beliefs. These establish our attitudes, rules, and assumptions. Attitudes refer to our emotions, convictions, and behaviors. Rules are the principles or regulations that govern our behaviors. Our assumptions are what we believe to be true or real. Intermediate beliefs are less rigid than core beliefs and influenced by our social, cultural, and environmental information and experience.
Negative Self-Beliefs and Image
All of these attributions produce distorted and maladaptive understandings of the self, others, and the world. Adaptive thoughts and behaviors are positive and functional. Maladaptive thoughts contort our reasoning and judgment, compelling us to ‘adapt’ negatively (maladapt) to situations. Distorted and irrational thoughts lead to dysfunctional behaviors and vice versa.
Situations, ANTs, and Cognitive Distortions
A situation is a set of circumstances – the facts, conditions, and incidents affecting us at a particular time in a particular place. A feared situation is one that provokes fears/anxieties that negatively impact our activities and associations.
We articulate our fears /anxieties through preprogrammed, self-fulfilling prophecies called ANTs. Automatic negative thoughts are involuntary, anxiety-provoking assumptions that spontaneously appear in response to anxiety-provoking situations. Examples include the classroom, a job interview, a social event, and family occasions. ANTs are negatively oriented, untruthful, and have no real power over us unless we enable them. Assumptions caused by our negative self-beliefs impact their content and expression.
Cognitive distortions are the exaggerated or irrational thought patterns involved in the perpetuation of our anxiety and depression. They twist our thinking to reinforce or justify our toxic behaviors. A prime example would be filtering, where we selectively choose to dwell on the negative aspects of a situation while overlooking the positive. We distort reality to avoid or validate our irrational attitudes, rules, and assumptions.
Solutions
We are not defined by our disorder, however. We are defined by our character strengths, virtues, and achievements. Through recovery, we dissociate ourselves from our condition. By stepping outside of the target, we perceive things rationally and objectively.
We learn to identify and analyze our negative attributions. ANTs, cognitive distortions, and maladaptive thoughts are emotional reactions to situations that call for rational evaluation and response.
Recovery and self-empowerment is regaining what has been stolen, misplaced, or lost. For social anxiety, it is our emotional well-being and quality of life. In self-empowerment, it is our self-esteem and motivation. In regaining these things, we consciously and deliberately transform our adverse habits, creating healthy new mindsets, skills, and abilities. Recovery is letting go of our negative self-perspectives and beliefs. Recovery opens us to possibilities unencumbered by prior acts.
WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT? ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing scientific and clinically practical methods including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.
Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.
The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided are applicable to most emotional malfunctions including depression, substance abuse, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and issues of self-esteem and motivation. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.
“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid, Málaga)
Shame and Recovery
Holding onto shame is reckless in recovery. One of the more identifiable characteristics of emotional disorder is our overriding sense of shame. This is in response to both internal and external attributions. Outside forces over which we have little to no control – public opinion, the media, stigma, and the pathographic mental health industry contribute significantly to our negative self-evaluation. Internally, we continue to express shame for our childhood behaviors that led to adolescent-onset – irrational but understandable in the face of our perceptions of undesirability and hopelessness.
Defining Shame
Psychology defines shame as the unpleasant, self-conscious feeling that comes from the sense of being or doing a dishonorable, ridiculous, or immodest act. It is irrational to feel shame for experiencing social anxiety, as we are not responsible for its origins. If there is any shame to be felt, therefore, it cannot legitimately be for our condition. If it is not in the being, then it must be in the doing – in our unwillingness or perceived inability to challenge it. We are not accountable for the hand we have been dealt. We are, however, responsible for how we play the cards we hold. We have the means to dramatically moderate our symptoms. Holding onto them is irrational.
Shame adversely impacts our psychological and physiological health, further eroding our negative self-image and low self-esteem. Shame is a negatively valenced emotion which is one that adversely affects our daily lives. Emotions like shame, guilt, and resentment negatively impact our thoughts, behaviors, and relationships. When left unresolved, they permeate our neural network with negative energy and obstruct the process of recovery. We have to let go to let in.
Self-recrimination for not managing our life is far more destructive than the symptoms of our condition. The shame of self-disappointment – that felt moral emptiness that pervades when we abandon our inherent ability and potential – is soul-crushing. And unnecessary.
Holding onto shame is reckless and implies that we do not care about the consequences. Simply put, if we have the wherewithal to enable our emotional well-being and quality of life and choose not to do so, we are reckless.
The dichotomy we find ourselves in is that social anxiety disorder compels us to view ourselves as helpless, hopeless, undesirable, and worthless. That is its function and that is how it sustains itself. If we accept that our condition is hopeless and we feel worthless, then we identify ourselves as helpless to do anything about it. SAD, therefore, controls our being and doing.
The primary goal of recovery from social anxiety is the moderation of our irrational fears and anxieties. This is best achieved through a three-pronged approach. To (1) replace or overwhelm our negative thoughts and behaviors with healthy, productive ones, (2) produce rapid, neurological stimulation to change the polarity of our neural network, and (3) regenerate our self-esteem using methods targeted toward our individual personality.
Unresolved shame impedes these objectives. Rather than moderating our fears and anxieties, it exacerbates them. Instead of regenerating our self-esteem, it weakens it.
Shame Symptomatology
When we feel shame, we want to hide and become invisible. Shame aggravates our anxiety and depression, causing us to withdraw from the world and avoid human connectedness. We feel powerless, acutely diminished, and incompetent. Until and unless these self-defeatisms are addressed, we remain caught in an endless cycle of desperation that alienates us from our true nature. The regeneration of our self-esteem alleviates the severity of our shame. Conversely, our shame amplifies our lacuna of self-esteem.
Adding insult to injury, the shame of denying ourselves our capacity to change leads to self-blaming. Especially pervasive in social anxiety disorder, self-blaming is an extremely toxic form of emotional self-abuse. We blame ourselves for our shortcomings. We blame ourselves for our lack of commitment or, if we commit, our failure to follow through. We blame ourselves for our inability to achieve our goals and objectives. Consequently, we blame ourselves for being and not doing.
Shame can be revealing, cathartic, and motivational when utilized appropriately, promoting emotional growth and broadened self-awareness. The shame of knowing we have the capacity to recover from that which has made our lives unbearable yet refuse to take advantage of it – that seems untenable. In the memorable words of John Greenleaf Whittier, “Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these, ‘It might have been.”
Commitment to Recovery
Recovery and self-empowerment require letting go of our negative self-perspectives, expectations, and beliefs, and opening our minds to new ideas and concepts. When we hold onto shame, we remain imprisoned in the past and our negative self-beliefs.
Recovery from social anxiety is theoretically simple. Making the commitment to recover is challenging. It takes courage. Following through on that commitment is a remarkable achievement. As an expert in recovery, I speak from observation and experience. Statistics are modest and disheartening.
Pre-recovery, our symptomatic emotional status is an entanglement of weeds in a garden of potential flourishing. The tools and techniques are there but we have to take them out of the shed and put them to work. Shame not only obstructs the door but represses the incentive. It wounds our being and doing.
WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT? ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing scientific and clinically practical methods including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.
Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.
The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided are applicable to most emotional malfunctions including depression, substance abuse, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and issues of self-esteem and motivation. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.
“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid Málaga)
Self-Empowered Means Forgiving
“It is not ‘forgive and forget,’ as if nothing wrong had ever happened, but ‘forgive and go forward,’ building on the past mistakes and the energy generated by reconciliation to create a new future.” – Alan Paton
There are three types of emotional conflict that, when left unresolved, negatively impact our psychological well-being: (1) those inflicted on us by others, (2) those we inflict on others, and (3) those we inflict on ourselves. In each instance, we are victims and abusers.
Victimized by the transgression against us, we self-abuse with our anger and resentment. When we transgress, we abuse the other and victimize ourselves with our shame and guilt. We self-victimize when we harm ourselves – a particularly insidious form of emotional self-abuse.
Dispatching these conflicts require forgiveness.
We retain an abundance of destructive information, formed by our core and intermediate beliefs – toxic neural input seemingly impervious to uprooting due to their repressive nature. A lot of this information stems from the unresolved debris of our negatively valenced emotions. Valanced is a psychological term used to characterize specific emotions that adversely affect our daily lives. Emotions like shame, guilt, and resentment negatively impact our thoughts, behaviors, and relationships. When left unresolved, they permeate our neural network with negative energy and obstruct the process of recovery.
Mistreatment by Other
We often hold onto anger and resentment because we convince ourselves it impacts those who harmed us. However, they are likely unaware or have forgotten their transgression or take no responsibility for it. The only person affected is us, the injured party. As Buddha purportedly said, “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; we are the one who gets burned.”
The act of forgiving resolves our animus and restores us to equal footing by eliminating the past and the other’s influence. Our innate drive for vengeance can be formidable; our baser instinct wants retribution. Forgiving removes our need for retaliation. It rids us of our vindictiveness.
Forgiving ourselves for harming another is accepting and releasing the toxicity of our actions. It is important to recognize that transgression against another subjectively affects us more severely than the person we harmed. We feel guilt for harming them, and shame for being the type of person who would cause harm. These self-destructive emotions can only be resolved by accepting responsibility, making direct or substitutional amends, and forgiving ourselves.
Self-Transgression
Self-transgression is particularly cataclysmic. It is defining ourself as deserving of abuse. Self-pity, contempt, and other hyphenated forms of self-sabotage devalue our self-esteem. Self-transgression invariably leads to blaming to relieve ourselves of the guilt.
Forgiving ourselves is challenging for those of us with social anxiety because our actions are underscored by our negative core and intermediate beliefs. By withholding forgiveness, we allow the transgressor to occupy valuable space in our brains. We are so inundated from childhood with the concept of forgiveness, we tend to disregard its power and significance.
These goals are inhibited by our negatively valenced emotions.
We fail to challenge these emotions because we have acclimated. We justify, savor, or wear them like a hair shirt. Not knowing any better, our neural network is accustomed to this negativity and continuously transmits the chemical hormones and other physiological benefits that sustain and give us pleasure.
The process of recovery consolidates and accelerates neural restructuring by feeding it positive stimuli to counter the years of symptomatic negativity. But our brains have less room for healthy input unless and until we evict the bad tenants. Retaining the toxicity of our self-destructive emotions aggravates our anxiety and depression, and compels behavioral obsessiveness, avoidance, and other personality shortfalls that impact our interconnectedness and self-esteem.
Negatively valenced emotions do have their usefulness. They can be revealing and motivating, precipitating emotional and spiritual growth and broadening self-awareness. Notwithstanding, resolution is important to rid ourselves of their neural residue. The inability or unwillingness to forgive is self-defeating.
Recovery requires letting go of our negative self-perspectives, expectations, and beliefs. It opens our minds to new ideas and concepts. Holding onto shame, guilt, and other hostile self-indulgences keeps us imprisoned in the past. Forgiving opens us to new possibilities unencumbered by prior acts. In the words of Mahatma Gandhi, “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”
I vividly recall a very likeable young man in one of our recovery groups who refused to entertain any prospect of absolving his parents. “If you knew what they’ve done to me you wouldn’t ask me to forgive them.” His adamancy was formidable. Despite his awareness of the ramifications, he denied himself the opportunity to purge the toxicity of his anger and resentment, much like a cancer victim refusing chemotherapy.
Forgiving is Not Forgetting
Forgiving expels negativity. We cannot hope to function optimally without absolving both ourselves and others whose actions impaired our emotional well-being. Our behaviors and those of others may seem indefensible, but forgiving is subjective. It is for our own well-being.
It is important to recognize that forgiving is not forgetting or condoning. It does not excuse transgressor or transgression; it takes their power away. Our noble self forgives; our pragmatic self remembers and remains mindful of the circumstance.
Holding ourselves or others accountable for harmful behavior are justifiable responses. Holding onto the corresponding anger and resentment is self-destructive. We forgive to promote change within ourselves and, as architects, we reap the rewards.
Stand Outside of the Bullseye
When we find it challenging to forgive someone for the harm they have inflicted upon us, it is helpful to consider their perspective. What was their motivation? What was their temperament? What was happening in their own lives?
Our social anxiety compels us to over-personalize, prohibiting alternative viewpoints. Our cognitive distortions blind us to any reality that conflicts with our self-centered point of view. There are at least two sides to every story, however. Stepping outside of the bullseye and viewing it from the other’s perspective reveals the larger narrative. It broadens our understanding of the motivations of the perpetrator. It allows us to consider what pressures they were under, their environment, and their influences. Perhaps they were trying to teach us a valuable lesson or scare us into correcting our behavior. Imperfect motivations may not excuse the act; nonetheless, it is important to understand the intent.
One additional factor to consider is our personal accountability. Perhaps our behaviors were less than exemplary.
Write a Forgiveness Letter
Many experts tout the psychological benefits of writing a letter to the person who harmed us, sharing our perspective of the event. How did it make us feel? What are its residual effects? How did it impact our relationship with the person and how do we feel about them now?
How would we have approached the situation? What would we have done differently to mitigate its emotional impact? What is our responsibility for the act?
Closing the letter with a statement of forgiveness and understanding concludes the situation and alleviates our feelings of resentment, shame, and guilt.
To resolve self-inflicted harm, we write that letter to ourselves, applying the same criteria. Through compassion and understanding, we recognize and accept that we are imperfect beings doing our best to live up to our expectations and potential.
Finally, we destroy the letter. Burn, bury, or shred it. There is no reason to allow a past, intangible action to preoccupy our thoughts. We symbolically wash our hands of the toxicity. The purpose of this exercise is to evict the bad tenants from our neural network, allowing room for new possibilities.
Make Amends and Move On
Rather than beating ourselves up for past behaviors, it is emotionally cathartic to apologize, make amends, and move on. As mature adults, we learn from our mistakes; if we choose to repeat them, we recognize we still have work to do. Given that our perpetrators have moved on, forgotten, or never took responsibility in the first place, making personal amends may be unfeasible and possibly dangerous. The most rational way to make amends is through altruistic and compassionate social behavior, e.g., teaching, compassion, and random acts of kindness.
Why hold onto something emotionally enervating from the past we cannot change or alter? The past is immutable. We have no control over it. It is the here-and-now and how it reflects on our future that is of value. The only logical response is to accept that it happened and realize it has no material impact on the present unless we allow it to fester. It is time to let it go and move on.
WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT? ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing scientific and clinically practical methods including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.
Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.
The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided are applicable to most emotional malfunctions including depression, substance abuse, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and issues of self-esteem and motivation. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.
“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid, Málaga)
Complementarity: ReChanneling Our Anxiety
Complementarityis a flashy psychological term that describes how things combine in such a way as to enhance or support the qualities of each other. They operate through simultaneous mutual interaction. Similar to integrality, complementarity describes how a unit can only function optimally if its components work effectively and in concert.
Simultaneous Mutual Interaction
Ourcardiovascular, immune, and skeletal systems are comprised of physiological components that, when working cohesively, enable the systems to operate. Our automobile requires multiple mechanical components working in sync to get from point A to point B.
Our neural network automatically engages complementarity by continuously transmitting chemical hormones. It provides acetylcholine for learning, noradrenaline for concentration, and glutamate for memory (mind); adrenaline supports our muscles and endorphins help us relax (body); we receive GABA for our anxiety, dopamine for motivation (spirit), and serotonin to stabilize our mood (emotions).
Complementarity is essential to anything dependent upon the successful interaction of its parts.
Our psychological apparatus functions through the simultaneous mutual interaction of mind, body, spirit, and emotions (MBSE). Why is this important to recovery? Because conscious and deliberate control of their complementarity helps us moderate the distressing symptoms of our anxiety.
There is one advantageous difference, however, between our MBSE and the other examples. When a component of our car or our physiology fails to perform, it can cause the collapse or deterioration of the entire unit. When either mind, body, spirit, or emotions is negatively impacted, the other three step up to keep the unit functioning, If a stressful situation causes our emotions to become temporarily unmanageable, we simply divert to one of the others. A prime example is when we deliberately rechannel the emotional angst of our fears and anxieties to the intellectual security of rational responses.
We unconsciously utilize complementary all the time. We ameliorate unmanageable thoughts and situations through physical activity or spiritual contemplation. We go for a walk to calm our emotions, meditate when anguished, and vent frustration by breaking something. It is a simple and logical process. When ‘A’ is distressing or overwhelming, we engage ‘B’, ‘C’, or “D” to mitigate “A.”Each is easily accessible because MBSE operates continuously as a cohesive, self-supporting unit.
In Concert
That our mind, body, spirit, and emotions work in concert does not suggest that each component works with the same level of intensity. One dominates the others depending upon the circumstance. If we feel nauseous, our mind wants to control it, we pray it will dissipate, and our emotions fear the worst. Nonetheless, our body usually holds the upper hand.
Consider what happens when we experience a freeway fender-bender. Our mind informs us we barely avoided injury; our heart pounds and we feel nauseous. We are angry and frustrated, and fiercely conscious of our mortality. Which is the dominant force depends upon a few obvious variables, e.g., how painful is the whiplash?
Automatic Negative Thoughts
Our automatic negative thoughts (ANTs) are the anxiety-provoking emotional expressions of our situational fears. They are the spontaneous evaluative thoughts that occur prior to, during, or right after a negative or stressful situation. A situationis a set of circumstances – the facts, conditions, and incidents affecting us at a particular time in a particular place. A feared situation provokes our symptomatic fears and anxieties. Our ANTs are the automatic emotional expressions of those fears.
Let us create a hypothetical example of complementarity in action. Our feared situation is a small social gathering. Our SAD symptoms convince us we are being unfairly criticized (mind). We hyperventilate and begin to perspire. We are convinced we will do or say something stupid (emotions), and our ANT is telling us “They probably won’t like me, anyway” (spirit).
Defining Spirit
Spirit and spirituality are enigmatic concepts; there is universal ambiguity in their definitions. For our purposes, spirit is defined as those self-properties regarded as forming the definitive or typical elements of our character at a specific time or in a specific situation. Are we compassionate and confident or hostile and arrogant? Spirit is our current temperament; emotion is the expression of that feeling. In a science-based recovery program, spirit and its declensions are unaffiliated with the ethereal human spirit or soul.When or how clients incorporate theology and the supernatural as their motivation is an individual matter.
Utilizing Complementarity
As we progress in recovery, we learn to deliberately engage complementarity to rechannel the anxiety that threatens our emotional well-being. We devise coping mechanisms to manage situations. There are multiple scientific and psychological approaches to help us understand and control the process of complementarity.
PsychoEducation teaches us about the relationship between thoughts, emotions, and physiological reactions. Cognitive comprehension involves correcting negative or inaccurate thoughts by identifying and analyzing them and developing rational responses. Roleplay helps modify our behaviors byvisualizing and practicing different ways of managing feared situations. By utilizing graded exposure, we start with situations that are easier for us to manage, then work our way up to more challenging tasks.
Rigorously employing these tools moderates our fears and apprehensions. In vivo exposure allows us to confront feared stimuli in real-world conditions. With practice, our coping mechanisms become as automatic as our ANTs. They become exponentially dispensable as we progress in our recovery.
WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT? ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing scientific and clinically practical methods including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.
Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.
The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided are applicable to most emotional malfunctions including depression, substance abuse, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and issues of self-esteem and motivation. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.
“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid, Málaga)
Embrace Your Condition
In recovery, we do not face our fears, we embrace them. Rather than confront them, which implies hostility, or challenge them, which signals competition, we willingly and enthusiastically recognize and accept all facets of our humanness. Whether in pre-recovery where our fears and anxieties run rampant or in-recovery where we have established governance, our experiences are part of our being – who we were, who we are, and who we have the potential to be.
Embracing our social anxiety encourages transformation. The act is not acquiescence, resignation, or condoning. Acquiescence is accepting our condition and doing nothing to change it. Condoning is accepting it and allowing it to fester. Resignation is defeatism. Embracing our condition is accepting who we are – human malfunctioning beings comprised of character strengths virtues, and attributes as well as shortcomings and vulnerabilities. We embrace our totality.
Social anxiety disorder is ostensibly the most underrated, misunderstood, and misdiagnosed disorder. It sustains itself by compelling irrational thoughts and behaviors. Emotionally, we feel depressed and lonely. Physically, we are subject to trembling, hyperventilation, nausea, fainting, and muscle spasms. Mentally, our thoughts are distorted and illogical. Spiritually, we define ourselves as incompetent, inadequate, and unworthy. Since SAD infects during adolescence, many of us have endured the distress of these negative self-perceptions for decades. Estimates reflect that roughly 60% of us also have depression and are prone to substance abuse. Recovering from social anxiety is a commitment that SAD will do anything to prevent us from making.
Goal and Objectives
The primary goal of recovery from social anxiety is the moderation of our irrational fears and anxieties. This is best achieved through a three-pronged approach. To (1) replace or overwhelm our negative thoughts and behaviors with healthy, productive ones, (2) produce rapid, neurological stimulation to change the polarity of our neural network, and (3) regenerate our self-esteem. These comprise our overall strategy.
The success of each activity requires a transformation – a rigorous and dramatic change in form and nature. Through proactive neuroplasticity, our neural network changes its form and configuration. Thought and behavior self-modification subverts the destructive nature of our negative self-beliefs. Mindfulness of our character strengths, virtues, and attributes regenerates our self-esteem. Hence, our form and nature have changed.
The difference between pre-recovery and in-recovery is immeasurable.The metamorphosis of our form and nature is evidence of the power of transformation. We are not the same entity. Mindfulness of our assets compels us to recognize and embrace the extraordinariness of our lives, self-confirming we are of value, desirable, and significant.
Self-Esteem
While we remain governed by our social anxiety disorder, we view ourselves as helpless, hopeless, undesirable, and worthless. These are the commonly accepted attributions of our malfunction. As we regenerate our self-esteem, we become less helpless and hopeless, but still feel undesirable and worthless. There is joylessness in self-satisfaction for its own sake. As intelligent, social beings, we are driven to share our resources. We are so overwhelmed and appreciative of our renewed self-awareness, we feel compelled to pay it forward.
Self-appreciation is the inherent byproduct of healthy self-esteem.
In pre-recovery, we remain overwhelmed by our negative core and intermediate beliefs. We eliminate those false abstractions by recognizing and rationally responding to their absurdity. We remove ourselves from the target, turn outwards, and expand our vision. Our broadened scope minimizes our SAD-indeed self-centeredness and isolation to embrace the largeness of others as they participate in society.
There is no cure for social anxiety disorder; there is dramatic moderation of its symptoms. Recovery does not eradicate our past, our memories, or experiences. It heightens them with a new positive perspective. Candid self-awareness is a fundamental component of self-esteem. If we cannot comprehend ourselves, warts and all, we cannot fully understand another.
In-Recovery
In-recovery describes someone who has been through a recovery program and utilizes the tools and techniques to effectively moderate their symptoms. In-recovery, we are no longer hopeless but confident and optimistic, appreciating possibility instead of inconceivability. We have subverted our core sense of helplessness by reanimating our self-reliance and resilience. We are desirable because we have become beneficial to others. Recovery has rediscovered our value and significance.
This awareness manifests in a sensitivity to the needs and experiences of others. By evicting our negatively valenced emotions of fear, shame, and guilt, we make room for new possibilities unencumbered by the past. This opens us to new relationships and commitments. Recognizing and accepting our strengths as well as vulnerabilities produces a more nuanced and compassionate perspective. We no longer see life through the glass darkly. Our emergence from the cave displays the world as it is, and generates what Dr. King called the fierce urgency of now, which we embrace with a vivid sense of belonging.
WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT? ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing scientific and clinically practical methods including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.
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Social Anxiety Disorder, Anxiety and Depression, and Comorbidities