Category Archives: Self-Empowerment

Regenerating Our Self-Esteem

Anxiety, Behavior, Cognitive Distortions, Mental Health, Psychology, ReChanneling, Self-Empowerment, Self-esteem, Social Anxiety, Social anxiety disorder, , ,

Robert F Mullen, PhD
Director/ReChanneling

Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.

The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided apply to most emotional malfunctions including depression, substance abuse, generalized anxiety, and issues of self-esteem and motivation. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.   

“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid, Málaga)   

“It is only when you have mastered the art of loving yourself
that you can truly love others.
It is only when you have opened your own heart
that you can touch the heart of others.”
– Robin Sharma

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Recent Posts

Perfectionism and Unreasonable Expectations

Coping Mechanisms for Social Anxiety

Negative Words Impede Recovery

Heaven’s Reward Fallacy

Regenerating Our Self-Esteem

Self-esteem is mindfulness of our value and significance to ourselves, society, and the world. It is the recognition and acceptance of our flaws and assets. It defines how we think about ourselves, how we think others perceive us, and how we process and present that information. 

Explicit and Implicit Self-Esteem

Persons experiencing social anxiety have significantly lower implicit and explicit self-esteem relative to healthy controls. Explicit is the conscious expression of our self-worth, appreciation, and acceptance. Implicit self-esteem is our nonconscious self-appraisal, often expressed by our automatic negative thoughts (ANTs). 

Maslow’s Hierarchy

Certain preconditions must be satisfied for healthy psychological development, including adequate sleep, security and safety, familial support, and a healthy environment. Social anxiety is the consequence of negative self-appraisal stemming from childhood disturbance, which can subvert particular biological, physiological, and emotional support.

A pioneer of positive psychology, Abraham Maslow‘s hierarchy of optimal human development contained five categories: physiological needs, safety and security, love and belonging, self-esteem, and self-actualization. While he later expanded the list, we are concerned about the preconditions that form our level of self-esteem. The hierarchy establishes the importance of satisfying these conditions for optimal development and how they complement and influence each other.

The pyramid on the left portrays healthy development. The one on the right reveals how unmet satisfactions imperil other needs within the hierarchy. It is worth noting that Maslow’s theory is based on Western culture and does not necessarily fit with different customs and traditions. 

Our development within the hierarchy is not purely linear but fluid and individualized, subject to experience and environment. A child will have difficulty learning if they are hungry. Without responsible parenting, they are unlikely to feel safe. 

Physiological Needs 

Physiological needs are the basic things we need for survival and healthy development. They include air, food, drink, shelter, warmth, sleep, and health. Deprivation of these disrupts our natural growth and impacts our core beliefs, which are more rigid in SAD persons because we tend to store information consistent with negativity, ignoring evidence that contradicts it.

Safety and Security

Childhood disturbances impact our feelings of safety and security. Our formative years need order, protection, and stability, and these securities stem from the parental unit. Any upheaval can generate feelings of abandonment, detachment, neglect, or exploitation, causing distrust of family, authority, and or relationships. 

Love and Belongingness 

Love and belongingness describe our physiological and emotional need for interpersonal and social relationships. We are societal beings; our fundamental need for connectivity is hardwired into our brains. For those of us experiencing SAD, personal attachment is challenging because of our fear and avoidance of relationships and social interaction. 

Human interconnectedness is a critical component of mental and physical health. Research has shown that healthy social contact boosts our immune system and protects our brain from neurodegenerative diseases. Positive interpersonal contact triggers the neurotransmission of chemical hormones that consolidate our self-esteem while enhancing learning, concentration, pleasure, and motivation.

Self-Esteem

Our sense of self-worth and appreciation gauges our level of self-esteem. Mindfulness of our character strengths, virtues, and accomplishments is the catalyst. While it enjoys respect and reciprocation from others (status and reputation), self-esteem is not defined by the approval of others. Otherwise, it would be labeled other­-esteem.

Any number of factors can impact our self-esteem, including our environment, sexual orientation, race and ethnicity, and education. Family, colleagues, teachers, and influential others contribute substantially. 

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Healthy Philautia

Philautia is the Greek dichotomy of self-love. At one end of the spectrum is the excessive love of self (narcissism) and, at the other, the recognition and appreciation of self (self-esteem). 

Narcissism is a condition in which people function with an inflated and irrational sense of importance, often expressed by haughtiness or arrogance. It is the need for excessive attention and admiration, masking an sense of inferiority and inadequacy. Although we may be uncomfortable with the label, social anxiety carries an unhealthy self-centeredness that approaches the definition of narcissism.

Healthy philautia recognizes our value and potential. It realizes that we are necessary to this life and of incomprehensible worth. By embracing ourselves, warts and all, we open ourselves to sharing our authenticity. 

To feel joy and fulfillment at self-being is the experience of healthy philautia. Self-esteem is a prerequisite to loving others. If we cannot appreciate ourselves, we cannot wholly cherish another. It is unfeasible to give away something we do not possess.

Regeneration

To regenerate means to renew or restore something damaged or lost. Because of the disruption in our optimal development, many positive self-qualities that construct our self-esteem are latent or dormant – underdeveloped or suspended. 

These self-qualities (e.g., confidence, reliance, compassion, and other self-hyphenates) are damaged but not lost. Disruption interrupts productivity. It does not destroy it. Like stimulating the unexercised muscle in our arm or leg, we can regenerate our self-esteem.

Goal and Objectives

The primary goal of recovery from social anxiety is the moderation of our fears and apprehensions. In self-empowerment, it is the rebuilding of our self-esteem and motivation. We execute these goals through a three-pronged approach.  

  1. Replace or overwhelm our negative thoughts and behaviors with healthy, productive ones.
  2. Produce rapid, concentrated neurological stimulation to overwhelm the negative abundance of our neural network.
  3. Regenerate our self-esteem through mindfulness of our assets.

Symptoms

Aaron Beck, the pioneer of cognitive-behavioral therapy, maintained that social anxiety provokes feelings of helplessness, hopelessness, and unworthiness. The concept of undesirability revealed itself in our SAD recovery workshops. Until we commit to recovery, we continue to be manipulated by these destructive self-beliefs. 

We struggle to build healthy relationships due to difficulties with intimacy, trusting partners, and establishing personal boundaries. We convince ourselves we are incompetent and socially inadequate. 

We compare ourselves unfavorably to others. Our expectations of criticism, ridicule, and rejection cause us to avoid personal affinity and collegiality.

Reframing

By reframing, we identify our self-esteem issues and revise our perspective on how we experience and respond to them. Positive reframing turns a negative perspective into a positive or neutral one. There are always multiple perspectives to any situation. While we may not control everything that happens, we always control how we react and respond. If we have a choice to be positive and happy, then it is illogical not to take advantage of the opportunity. 

So, although there may be justification for negative thinking, it is in our interest to reframe our thinking to accelerate and consolidate the positive restructuring of our neural network. Our negative thoughts are unhealthy and nonproductive. Experts agree that positive reframing is critical for emotional well-being. 

Reframing addresses our negativity in general, while rational response focuses on our situational fears and apprehensions.

Rational Response

A rational response is a logical, self-affirming counter to our fears and ANTs. Automatic negative thoughts are our immediate, involuntary emotional expressions that occur when challenged in a particular situation. They are the unpleasant, self-defeating things we tell ourselves that define who we are, who we think we are, and who we think others think we are. They are borne of our core and intermediate beliefs and sustained by our negative self-appraisal. (“No one will talk to me.” “I’ll do something stupid.” “I’m a loser.”)

The logical counters to our ANTs are rational responses or ARTs (automatic rational thoughts). For example, in response to the situational fear of adverse criticism, the corresponding ANT might be, “I am inadequate and don’t belong here.” Rational responses could include: “I am entitled to be here as much as anyone.” “I am valuable and significant.” “I am equal to anyone here.” 

Identify the Problem

To reframe or rationally respond to a fear or apprehension, we must determine its trajectory.

1. We identify the situation where our self-esteem is an issue. Where are we? Who is present? What is causing our distress? 

2. We unmask our fears and apprehensions. What is problematic for us in the situation? How do we feel (physically, intellectually, emotionally)? What is our specific concern or worry? Are we afraid of rejection? Are we worried we will say something stupid? Are we concerned people will criticize or ridicule us? 

3. We identify our corresponding ANTs. These are the involuntary, emotional, self-defeating expressions of our fears – the self-defeating things we tell ourselves. “No one will talk to me.” I’ll say something stupid.” “I’m a loser.” She’ll reject me.”

4. We examine and analyze our fears and corresponding ANTs. What are the causes, thoughts, and images precipitating them? How do we counter their illogicality?

5. Once we have examined, analyzed, and accepted the self-destructive and unreasonable nature of our fears and corresponding ANTs, we reframe or rationally respond to them.

Our thoughts and beliefs might be positive or negative. They might be rational, based on reason or fact. Our fears and apprehensions may also be based on facts and experience. They are not reasonable, however, but created on false assumptions.

Moderating our self-esteem and motivation issues is best accomplished in a workshop environment where we can identify and examine the challenges through personal introspection, memory work, journalling, role-playing, and other tools and techniques that help us regenerate our self-esteem.

Even so, we can practice certain tools and strategies on our own.

Write Your Character Resume

A character resume is a compilation of our positive qualities, achievements, and memories. Mindfully retrieving and cataloging these qualities compels us to embrace our value, confirming we are desirable, consequential, and worthy. What goes on our character resume? Anything and everything that activates a positive response including our strengths, achievements, contributions, personal milestones, talents, and charitable deeds.

Character Strengths, Virtues, and Attributes. Due to our negative self-analysis, we tend to repress, misplace, and forget our inherent and developed assets. They are not erased or lost, however, but compartmentalized from our active consciousness. Renewed mindfulness of these strengths and incorporating them into our daily lives help regenerate our self-esteem. 

Positive Autobiography lists our successes, achievements, contributions, personal milestones, talents, charitable deeds, and service to others. Recollecting and recognizing our accomplishments encourages us to embrace the extraordinariness of our lives.

Positive Personal Affirmations  PPAs are self-motivating, empowering statements that help us focus on goals, challenge negative, self-defeating beliefs, and reprogram our subconscious minds. 

Self-Esteem Self-Analysis. What do we like about ourselves mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually, and socially?  

Set Boundaries

Boundaries establish the standard of treatment to which we believe we are entitled. They define what behaviors towards us are acceptable or unacceptable. Boundaries protect us from invasions of our space, feelings, limitations, and expectations. They allow us to enforce our identity, empower our goals and objectives, and prevent others from manipulating, exploiting, or taking advantage of us. 

Knowing our boundaries comes from a healthy sense of self-awareness. Securing them takes self-confidence and a keen recognition of our value and significance. Healthy emotional boundaries value our feelings and needs. 

Our social anxiety provokes us to anticipate criticism and ridicule. We obsess over what others think and say about us. Our desire to be accepted makes us reticent to assert our needs and conditions for security and happiness.

Our incapacity to establish, develop, and maintain relationships creates the fear that boundaries limit the possibility of human connection. We worry that self-assertion will bring rejection and isolation. Our negative self-appraisal convinces us we are unworthy.

Rather than say no, we overextend ourselves and put the needs of others above our own, which causes us to feel inferior, resentful, and exploited.

Boundaries are essential to all healthy relationships. Boundaries bring us closer rather than separating ourselves from others because we set clear understandings of personal values. Defining acceptable behavior provides a sense of communication and self-assurance. When we set boundaries, we determine how we live our lives rather than allowing others to decide.

Defense Mechanisms

Defense mechanisms are temporary safeguards against situations that challenge our conscious minds. They are unconscious and automatic psychological responses designed to protect us from our fears and apprehensions. 

We overcompensate, deny, repress, and rationalize. We project our irrational behaviors onto others rather than confront them, and we displace our guilt by kicking the dog. 

Cognitive Distortions are exaggerated or irrational thought patterns that perpetuate our anxiety and depression. We twist reality to reinforce or justify our toxic thoughts and behaviors. Social anxiety paints an inaccurate picture of the self in the world with others. 

The number of cognitive distortions ranges substantially. Thirteen are particularly adept at subverting our self-esteem, including:

Polarized thinking. In polarized thinking, we perceive things as absolute – black or white. There is no middle ground, no compromise. We are either brilliant or abject failures. Our friends are for us or against us. We refuse to give people the benefit of the doubt. Worse than our anxiety about criticism is our self-judgment. We must be broken and inept if we are not flawless and masterful. There is no room for mistakes or mediocrity.

Filtering. When we filter, we focus on the negative aspects of our lives, fixating on situations and memories that supporting our defeatist self-appraisal. This creates an emotional imbalance due to excluding healthy thoughts and behaviors. We view ourselves, the world, and our future through an unforgiving lens.

Emotional Reasoning. Emotional reasoning is when we make judgments and decisions based only on our feelings – relying on our emotions or instincts over objective evidence. At the root of this cognitive distortion is the belief that what we feel must be true. If we feel like a loser, then we must be a loser. If we feel incompetent, then we must be incapable. If we make a mistake, we must be stupid.

Self-Labeling. When we label an individual or group, we reduce them to a single, usually negative, characteristic or descriptor based on a single event or behavior. When we self-label, we sustain our negative self-appraisal. Negative self-labeling supports our sense of incompetence and undesirability, and our subsequent behaviors often support those labels. 

We are consumed and conditioned by negative words. Some of us use the exact destructive words over and over again. The more we hear, read, or speak a word or phrase, the more power it has over us. It is not just the words we say out loud in criticism and conversations.

The self-annihilating words we silently call ourselves are even more destructive. Would we use these words against a colleague or loved one? If we wouldn’t say them to someone else, why would we say them to ourselves? Words have power.

Understanding how we use defense mechanisms as subconscious strategies to avoid facing certain truths is crucial to recovery. Our compulsion to twist the truth to validate our negative self-beliefs is formidable. It is vital to understand how these distortions sustain our social anxiety and depression. 

Self-Appreciation  

Self-appreciation is recognizing and enjoying our good qualities, efforts, and achievements. We have been beating ourselves up for our condition for too long. We deserve to experience the pride and satisfaction that complements our significance and positive individuality. Self-appreciation dramatically regenerates our self-esteem while accelerating and consolidating neural restructuring. 

Give yourself credit for making positive changes. Recognize all the good things you accomplish daily. Appreciate yourself by doing something nice for yourself every day. We are in charge of our emotional well-being and quality of life. We are responsible for the regeneration of our self-esteem. Self-esteem is the catalyst for self-appreciation. In reciprocation, self-appreciation consolidates self-esteem. We take care of ourselves to take care of others. We embrace our worth and potential to champion them in others. 

Proactive Neuroplasticity YouTube Series

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WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT?  ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing neuroscience and psychology including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.

Underrated, Misunderstood, and Neglected

Anxiety, Behavior, Mental Health, Neuroplasticity, Psychology, ReChanneling, Self-Empowerment, Social Anxiety, Social anxiety disorder, , , ,

Social Anxiety

Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.

The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided apply to most emotional malfunctions, including depression, substance abuse, generalized anxiety, and self-esteem and motivation issues. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.  

“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid, Málaga)   

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Recent Posts

Perfectionism and Unreasonable Expectations

Coping Mechanisms for Social Anxiety

Negative Words Impede Recovery

Heaven’s Reward Fallacy

Dual Perspectives on Shame in Recovery

Underrated, Misunderstood,
and Neglected

Lifesfinewhine
November 11, 2023
Robert F Mullen, PhD

Social anxiety disorder (SAD) is culturally identifiable by our persistent fear and avoidance of social interaction and performance situations, which cause us to miss the opportunities that connect us with the world.

Notwithstanding our desire to recover, our feelings of helplessness, hopelessness, undesirability, and worthlessness convince us that we are not only broken but irreparable and unworthy of the effort.

Recovery is Transformation

The difference between pre-recovery and in-recovery is immeasurable. Social anxiety steals our autonomy, hopes, and self-esteem. Recovery regains what has been stolen or lost. It realizes our strengths, virtues, and attributes. We become stronger and more confident, especially in controlling our lives and claiming our rights as valuable and consequential contributors to society. 

Recovery is a transformation – a rigorous and dramatic change in form and nature. Through proactive neuroplasticity, we change the form and configuration of our neural network. Thought and behavior self-modification subverts the destructive nature of our negative self-appraisal. Mindfulness of our assets and possibilities regenerates our self-esteem. Hence, our form and nature transform. 

This writing contains thoughts and observations from my work with clients in recovery and my personal bouts with social anxiety. The quotes are from workshop graduates. 

The ‘Neglected’ Anxiety Disorder

Social anxiety is ostensibly the most underrated and misunderstood emotional affliction. Nicknamed the ‘neglected anxiety disorder,’ therapists avoid it due to difficulty distinguishing its symptoms and identifying specific etiological and risk factors. Few understand it, and even fewer know how to address it effectively. One has to experience social anxiety to recognize its destructive severity. 

Anxiety is a normal facet of life, and the typical individual accords it appropriate deference. Those of us experiencing SAD personify our symptoms, dramatize them, and obsess about their negative implications. We create mountains out of molehills, spending our days in tortuous anticipation of our projected adverse outcomes. We beat ourselves up daily for our perceived incompetence and inability to function socially. 

We feel shame for our condition because society inherently fears and loathes what it refuses to understand. Shame is painful and incapacitating. It makes us feel powerless and acutely diminished. It makes us want to hide and become invisible. It drives us to withdraw from the world and avoid human connection. 

One client shares, “I spent high school trying to hide in every dark corner with a book in my face. I never once ate lunch in four years, and never once went to the bathroom in four years at my high school, for fear of having to interact with people.” 

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Symptoms and Traits

SAD attacks on all fronts, delivering mental confusion, emotional instability, physical dysfunction, and spiritual malaise. Emotionally, we are depressed and lonely. In social situations, we sweat, tremble, mumble, and hyperventilate. Mentally, our thoughts are distorted and irrational. Spiritually, we define ourselves as inadequate and insignificant. Many of us suffer from depression and gamble with substance abuse to blunt the discomfort of our condition. 

Our social interactions are clumsy, small talk inelegant, and attempts at humor embarrassing. We self-prophesize criticism, ridicule, and rejection. SAD is repressive and intractable, imposing self-destructive thoughts and behaviors. It establishes its authority through defeatist measures produced by inaccurate and unsound interpretations of reality. “Anxiety has crippled me, locked me in a cage and has become my master.”  ̶  Elizabeth G. 

We fear the unknown and unexplored. We crave companionship but shun intimacy, expecting to be deemed undesirable. We circle the block repeatedly before a social event to bolster our courage. More often than not, we end up in the bar around the corner. It is not our situational fears that destroy our lives; it is our ‘inability’ to confront them.

Childhood Disturbance

Cumulative evidence that childhood disturbance is a primary causal factor in emotional instability has been well-established. While the word ‘disturbance’ generates images of overt abuse, any number of things define it. Parents may be controlling or unable to provide emotional validation. Perhaps we are subject to sibling bullying or a broken home. 

Disturbance can be intentional or accidental, real or imagined. (The suggestibility of the pre-adolescent is legendary.) A toddler whose parental quality time is interrupted by a phone call can form a core belief of abandonment. SAD senses the emotional vulnerability and onsets at adolescence, often lingering in our system for years before manifesting. 

It’s Not Our Fault

It is essential to recognize that our social anxiety is not our fault nor the result of aberrant behavior. We did not ask for it. We did not make it happen. It happened to us. We are not accountable for the hand we have been dealt. 

We are, however, responsible for how we play the cards in our hand. The onus of recovery is on us. Experts supply the tools, but we must take them out of the shed and put them to work. 

Undoubtedly, this sociological model conflicts with moral models that claim our behaviors are responsible for onset or that it is God’s punishment for sin. Those beliefs are sadly misinformed.

Acceptance

Social connectedness is a central requirement for emotional well-being. In unambiguous terms, the desire for acceptance is at the heart of our condition, but our social avoidance and fear of intimacy challenge our ability to establish, develop, and maintain healthy relationships. We feel trapped in a vicious circle, restricted from living a productive life, alienated from our peers, and isolated from our families. Bryce S. writes: “I find myself very scared to open up, be honest, be intimate, and trust people … I guess I realized I’m starved for genuine connections.” 

Cognitive Bias

We store information consistent with our negative beliefs. Even when inaccurate, they define how we think about ourselves, how we think others think about us, and how we process that information. By declining to question these beliefs, we sustain a cognitive bias that compels us to misinterpret experience. Even when we accept the irrationality of our fears and apprehensions, their emotional impact is so significant that our attitudes, rules, and assumptions run roughshod over any healthy, rational response. 

SAD in Recovery 

How do we recover? We exponentially erode SAD’s negativity by compelling our brain to repattern its neural circuitry. We counter our fears and anxieties by rationally responding to the automatic negative thoughts perpetuating them. We identify and process our defense mechanisms – those irrational thought patterns that twist our thinking and paint a distorted picture of ourselves and our world.  We recognize that our learned helplessness, hopelessness, undesirability, and worthlessness are SAD-induced falsities. 

Proactive Neuroplasticity

Neuroplasticity is evidence of our brain’s constant adaptation to stimuli. Scientists refer to the process as structural remodeling of the brain. It’s what makes learning and registering new experiences possible. All information notifies our neural network to realign, generating a correlated change in behavior and perspective. 

What is significant is our ability to dramatically accelerate and consolidate learning by compelling our brain to repattern its neural circuitry. The deliberate, repetitive neural input of positive information (DRNI) empowers us to transform our thoughts and behaviors, creating healthy new mindsets, skills, and abilities. Proactive neuroplasticity is not psychology but hard science. They share credit for recovery. 

Goal and Objectives

The primary goal of recovery from social anxiety is the moderation of our fears and anxieties. We achieve this through a three-pronged approach. 

  1. Replace or overwhelm our negative thoughts and behaviors with healthy, productive ones.
  2. Produce rapid, concentrated neurological stimulation to overwhelm the negative abundance of our neural network.
  3. Regenerate our self-esteem through mindfulness of our assets.

A one-size-fits-all recovery strategy cannot sufficiently address individual complexity. We are better served by integrating multiple traditional and non-traditional approaches developed through client trust, cultural assimilation, and therapeutic innovation. Our environment, heritage, conflicts, and associations reflect our wants, choices, and aspirations. If they are not given serious consideration, then we are not appropriately valued. 

A coalescence of science, psychology, and philosophy is essential to capture the diversity of human thought and experience. The science of proactive neuroplasticity aids in restructuring our neural network. Cognitive and behavioral mechanisms help us replace or overcome toxic thoughts and behaviors. Positive psychologies focus on reclaiming our strengths, virtues, and attributes. Philosophy, existentially defined, welcomes religious and spiritual insight. 

The recovery process is theoretically simple but challenging due to the long-term commitment. We cannot replace self-destructive motivations and actions overnight. We are emotionally averse to change, and human physiology is hard-wired to oppose anything jeopardizing its equilibrium. Our brain’s inertia senses and repels change, and our basal ganglia resist modifying behavior patterns. That’s why habits are hard to break and resolutions challenging to maintain. 

But change is overtly doable, and that’s the message here. Recovery works, and the transformation is extraordinary. “It is one of the best investments I have made in myself, and I will continue to improve and benefit from it for the rest of my life.” – Nick P.

Behavior modification is a concerted process. Regenerating our self-esteem requires intense introspection and cognitive comprehension. Neural restructuring demands a tedious regimen that fails to deliver immediate tangible results, causing us to readily concede defeat in this era of instant gratification. 

However, once we start down the path, our capacity for transformation grows exponentially. All learning and experience notify our neural network to realign, generating a continuous and correlated change in behavior and perspective. A comprehensive recovery program provides the tools and techniques. The decision to utilize them is on us. 

__________

Lifesfinewhine is a trendsetting Canadian website offering valuable insight into mental health issues. Site producer, Pooja, was diagnosed with depression and social anxiety as a teenager. Research and self-reflection have given her a better understanding of mental health illnesses as well as the stigma that surrounds the topic.

Proactive Neuroplasticity YouTube Series

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WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT?  ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing neuroscience and psychology including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.

Heaven’s Reward Fallacy

Anxiety, Cognitive Distortions, Self-Empowerment, Social Anxiety, Social anxiety disorder, , ,

Robert F. Mullen, PhD
Director/ReChanneling

Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.

The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided apply to most emotional malfunctions, including depression, substance abuse, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and self-esteem and motivation issues. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.  

“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid, Málaga)   

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Recent Posts

Hemispheric Synchronization via Active and Proactive Neuroplasticity

Perfectionism and Unreasonable Expectations

Coping Mechanisms for Social Anxiety

Negative Words Impede Recovery

Cognitive Distortion #13

Heaven’s Reward Fallacy

Heaven’s Reward Fallacy is the unreasonable assumption that we will be justly rewarded for our hard work and sacrifice. Aaron Beck, the father of cognitive-behavioral therapy, describes it as “expecting all sacrifice and self-denial to pay off, as if there were someone keeping score, and feeling disappointed and even bitter when the reward does not come.”

Unmet Expectations

This irrational belief drives us to do things for others with the expectation of reward or reciprocation. While a return on our investment is possible to some degree, it is unreasonable to presume it will happen. When our expectations are unmet, the associated disappointment aggravates our social anxiety and leads to depression, frustration, and resentment.

The symptomatic fear of human connectivity and avoidance of social situations underscores the SAD person’s craving for recognition and appreciation. Our apprehensions of criticism, ridicule, and rejection induce loneliness and isolation. Subsequently, we reach out, hoping to alleviate our condition.

Fallacy of Fairness

The fallacy of fairness is the unrealistic assumption that life should be subjectively fair. Couples with heaven’s reward fallacy, we find ourselves caught up in an endless cycle of disappointment and self-destructive behavior. We know how we want to be treated, and anything that displaces that is emotionally untenable – even if our expectations are immoderate and implausible.

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Unhealthy Motivations

Fixing the expectation of reward in our minds for services rendered makes it real and visceral, driving us to repeat our behavior. We overcompensate or become codependent, continually saying yes to others – often sacrificing our needs. Sacrifice carries the expectation of reward. 

We seek perfectionism in our drive to be appreciated and loved by others. We become consummate enablers, compensating for our feelings of undesirability and worthlessness. Rather than setting boundaries, we allow ourselves to be bullied and taken advantage of, seeking affirmation and appreciation. Setting boundaries is challenging for persons experiencing social anxiety. Compensation, codependency, and perfectionism are prevalent traits.

We undervalue our worth and significance by engaging in heaven’s reward fallacy. We tell ourselves our actions are selfless, but they are motivated by our neediness and loneliness.

Set Reasonable Expectations 

It is human nature to expect reciprocation for our efforts. Life, however, is not fair. Setting rational, reasonable, possible, positive, and unconditional expectations is crucial to avoid disappointment.

Set Expectations Early On

Setting expectations carefully in advance allows us to determine what is reasonable and doable. We can preplan strategies and coping mechanisms to help meet them. We can only reasonably set expectations of ourselves, however. We have no control over the responses and reactions of others, so setting expectations of their behavior is pointless and will only lead to frustration and disappointment. It is called self-esteem, not other-esteem. 

Self-Esteem

Persons experiencing SAD are subject to significantly lower implicit and explicit self-esteem than healthy controls. Latent self-qualities, however, can be regenerated through specific tools and techniques. Healthy self-esteem accelerates and consolidates the structure and effectiveness of reasonable expectations. Rebuilding our self-esteem is a primary objective in recovery and self-empowerment.

Don’t Beat Yourself Up

No matter how reasonably we set them, our expectations will often be partially or wholly unmet. We may need to modify them to accommodate the situation. We may require more practice or need to extend our planned timeframe. Reasonable expectations require flexibility. 

Be Mindful of Distorted Thinking

Persons experiencing social anxiety are highly susceptible to cognitive distortions. Recognizing, comprehending, and accepting the self-destructive nature of these and other defense mechanisms is essential to recovery. 

Proactive Neuroplasticity YouTube Series

*          *          *

WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT?  ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing neuroscience and psychology, including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.

Dual Perspectives on Shame in Recovery

Anxiety, Behavior, Mental Health, Psychology, Self-Empowerment, Social Anxiety, Social anxiety disorder, , , ,

Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.

The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided apply to most emotional malfunctions, including depression, substance abuse, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and self-esteem and motivation issues. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.                     

“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid, Málaga)   

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Recent Posts

Hemispheric Synchronization via Active and Proactive Neuroplasticity

Perfectionism and Unreasonable Expectations

Coping Mechanisms for Social Anxiety

Negative Words Impede Recovery

Feeling Our Way Through Life

3Rs of Recovery and Self-Empowerment

The Blame Game

Coping Strategies for Social Anxiety

Dual Perspectives on Shame in Recovery

One of the more identifiable characteristics of social anxiety is our overriding sense of shame. Externally, we are subject to prejudice and misinformation. Public opinion, the media, and mental health stigma contribute significantly to our negative self-evaluation. Internally, we feel shame for the defects and behaviors that support our emotional malfunction. 

Defining Shame

Psychology defines shame as the unpleasant, self-conscious feeling from being or participating in a dishonorable, ridiculous, or immodest act. Although correlating and coexisting, shame is not the same as guilt. We feel guilt for doing something wrong, whereas shame is the perception of being wrong.  

Shame and Social Anxiety

Shame can be painful and incapacitating. It can make us feel powerless and acutely diminished. When we feel shame, we want to hide and become invisible. We withdraw from the world and avoid human connectedness. We feel powerless, acutely diminished, and incompetent. These are also the prevailing symptoms of our social anxiety, so shame aggravates our condition, causing us to readily concede defeat and abandon hope. Until we rationally respond to these self-defeatisms, we remain caught in an endless cycle of desperation that alienates us from our true nature.

However, treating shame as an unhealthy emotion without considering the positive aspects of the experience is a missed opportunity for emotional well-being. Shame can be revealing, cathartic, and motivational, promoting growth and self-awareness. One of the positive attributions of shame is our moral recognition and analysis of right or wrong. 

Therefore, we must consider a balanced perspective and determine whether our shame is irrational or justifiable. We can subsequently evaluate and respond appropriately. 

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Is Our Shame Irrational or Justifiable?

Shame is irrational if it is in response to experiencing social anxiety. We are not accountable for its onset. We did not make it happen. It happened to us. There is no legitimacy for feeling shame for adolescent-onset due to childhood disturbance. SAD is common, universal, and indiscriminate, impacting roughly one in four adolescents and adults. There is no shame in experiencing the symptoms of social anxiety.

Shame is, however, justifiable in our unwillingness to remedy our social anxiety. While we are not accountable for the hand we have been dealt, we are responsible for how we play those cards. We have the means to moderate our symptoms dramatically, and not taking advantage of recovery is irrational. While there is no sensible reason to feel shame for having social anxiety, it is a legitimate emotional response to our unwillingness to do something about it. 

The Long-Term Inefficacy of Defense Mechanisms

It is common for individuals experiencing social anxiety to go to enormous lengths to remain ignorant of SAD’s destructive capabilities as if, by ignoring them, they do not exist or will somehow go away. We hide behind defense mechanisms or cognitively distort reality. We deny, compensate, project, and dissociate to avoid confronting our symptoms. 

Notwithstanding, none of these psychological responses, designed to protect us from our fears/anxieties, are effective in the long term. Irrational thought patterns perpetuate our anxiety and depression. Rather than justifying our toxic thoughts and behaviors, they reinforce them. They do not subvert our awareness of our condition; they merely conceal it from our consciousness. Nonetheless, the symptoms persist. 

The guilt of knowing, even subconsciously, that we can moderate that which has made our lives unbearable. Refusing to acknowledge or take advantage of recovery is untenable. Resistance, subconscious or otherwise, propagates our shame and other negatively valenced emotions. Rather than protecting our consciousness, it exposes it to negative neural feedback.

Negatively Valenced Emotions

Valanced is a psychological term to characterize specific emotions that negatively affect our daily lives. When left unresolved, these adverse emotions, including shame, guilt, and resentment, impact our psychological and physiological health, aggravating our negative self-appraisal and low self-esteem. They adversely affect our thoughts, behaviors, and relationships, permeate our neural network with negative energy, and obstruct the process of recovery. 

Self-Disappointment

Self-recrimination for not managing our emotional well-being life is far more destructive than the symptoms of our condition. The shame of self-disappointment – the moral emptiness that pervades when we abandon our inherent ability and potential – is soul-crushing. And unnecessary.

Unresolved Shame is Reckless

Holding onto shame is reckless because it suggests we do not care about the consequences. Simply put, we are reckless if we have the wherewithal to enable our emotional well-being and quality of life and choose not to do so. The dichotomy we find ourselves in is that social anxiety compels us to view ourselves as helpless, hopeless, undesirable, and worthless. That is its function, and that is how it sustains itself. If we do nothing to alleviate these attributions, when recovery is accessible, we allow SAD to control us rather than the alternative. We continue to feel helpless, hopeless, undesirable, and worthless.  

Recovery Goal and Objectives

Committing to recovery is one of the hardest things we will ever do. It takes enormous courage and the realization that we are of value, consequential, and deserving of happiness. Social anxiety is relentless and manipulative in its efforts to prevent that commitment. SAD thrives in our unhappiness.

The primary goal of recovery from social anxiety is the moderation of our irrational fears and anxieties. In self-empowerment, it is the rebuilding of our self-esteem and motivation. We achieve this through a three-pronged approach.

  1. Replace or overwhelm our negative thoughts and behaviors with healthy, productive ones.
  2. Produce rapid, concentrated neurological stimulation to overwhelm the negative abundance of our neural network.
  3. Regenerate our self-esteem through mindfulness of our assets.

Unresolved shame impedes these goals. Rather than moderating our fears and anxieties, it exacerbates them. Instead of regenerating our self-esteem, it weakens it.

Blaming

Another product of our negatively valanced emotions is our compulsion to blame others when the self-destructive nature of our shame, guilt, and resentment becomes unmanageable to our consciousness. Years of self-reproach for our negative thoughts and behaviors can be overwhelming. Our defense mechanisms impel us to hold others responsible for things we are unable or unwilling to manage emotionally. We convince ourselves that others are responsible for the hopelessness and unworthiness caused by our anxiety. Someone must be held accountable for our perceived incompetence and inadequacies. 

Self-Blaming

Or we resort to self-blame. Especially pervasive in social anxiety disorder, self-blaming is a highly toxic form of emotional self-abuse. We blame ourselves for our shortcomings. We blame ourselves for our lack of commitment or our failure to follow through. We blame ourselves for our inability to achieve our goals and objectives. Consequently, we blame ourselves for both irrational and justifiable shame.

Committing to Recovery

Recovery and self-empowerment require letting go of our negative self-perspectives, expectations, and beliefs and opening our minds to new ideas and concepts. When we hold onto shame, we remain imprisoned in the past and our negative self-beliefs.

Pre-recovery, our symptomatic emotional status is an entanglement of weeds in a garden of potential flourishing. The tools and techniques are there, but we must bring them out of the shed and put them to work. Shame not only obstructs the door but represses the incentive.

Proactive Neuroplasticity YouTube Series

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WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT?  ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing neuroscience and psychology including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.

GROUPS – WORKSHOPS – SESSIONS

Anxiety, LGBTQ, Mental Health, Neuroplasticity, Psychology, Self-Empowerment, Social Anxiety, Social anxiety disorder, , ,

The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided apply to most emotional malfunctions, including depression, substance abuse, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and self-esteem and motivation issues. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.                     

“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid, Málaga)   

ReChanneling’s Groups – Workshops – Sessions

Recovery is regaining possession of something stolen or lost. Self-empowerment is making a conscious decision to become stronger and more confident in controlling our lives. In neuroses such as anxiety, depression, and comorbidities, what has been stolen is our emotional well-being and quality of life. In self-empowerment, it is the loss of self-esteem and motivation. Accordingly, both recovery and self-empowerment deal with regaining what has been lost.

  • Plasticity: capable of being altered or molded or
  • Neuroplasticity: the ability of the brain to form and reorganize synaptic connections in response to learning or experience.
  • Reactive neuroplasticity is our brain’s natural response to things over which we have limited to no control – stimuli we absorb but do not initiate or focus on. A car alarm, lightning, the smell of baked goods. Our neural network automatically restructures itself to what happens around us. 
  • Active neuroplasticity happens through intentional pursuits like creating, yoga, and journaling. We control active neuroplasticity because we consciously choose the activity. A significant component of active neuroplasticity is our altruistic and compassionate social behavior, e.g., teaching, compassion, and random acts of kindness.
  • Proactive neuroplasticity is rapid, concentrated neurological stimulation to change the polarity of our neural network from toxic to positive. This is best consummated by DRNI – the deliberate, repetitive neural input of information.

Recovery and self-empowerment workshops have three objectives: to (1) replace or overwhelm our negative thoughts and behaviors with healthy, productive ones, (2) produce rapid, neurological stimulation to change the polarity of our neural network, and (3) regenerate our self-esteem. The successful realization of these objectives compels us to recognize and celebrate the extraordinariness of our lives, confirming we are desirable and consequential.

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SUPPORT GROUPS
Support Groups and Group Sessions provided pro bono.

Social Anxiety and Proactive Neuroplasticity

Since 2021; 385+ members. All day, every day, we experience fear, anxiety, and loneliness. SAD makes us feel helpless, hopeless, undesirable, and worthless. We worry about criticism, disapproval, and rejection, never quite ‘fitting in.’ We feel socially inferior and incompetent. Utilizing an integration of neuroscience and psychology, we develop individually targeted tools and techniques that accelerate and consolidate our recovery from social anxiety.

Our paradigmatic approach to recovery targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration, utilizing scientific and clinically practical methods. We provide (1) a welcoming and confidential space for members to share their experiences and meet people with similar concerns and (2) the tools and techniques for recovery from social anxiety.

The Social Anxiety and Proactive Neuroplasticity group conducts online group sessions focusing on issues impacting our daily lives.

LBGTQ+ Social Anxiety Group

Since 2997, 750+ members. The LGBTQ+ community is almost twice as susceptible to social anxiety as our heterosexual and cisgender counterparts. Social anxiety disorder makes us feel helpless and hopeless. We isolate ourselves due to our fears of criticism and rejection. Our group’s paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing scientific and clinically practical methods, including active and proactive neuroplasticity and cognitive-behavioral self-modification.

The LGBTQ+ Social Anxiety Group conducts online group sessions focusing on issues that impact our daily lives. Our primary objective is to provide a secure and confidential environment where individuals can share their stories and issues and get answers from persons who understand and care.

ReChanneling: Recovery and Self-Empowerment

Since 2020; 120+ members. Proactive neuroplasticity fundamentally applies to pursuing personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living.

It accelerates learning by deliberately compelling our brain to repattern its neural circuitry. It is what makes learning and registering new experiences possible. All information notifies our brain to restructure, producing a correlated change in behavior and perspective.

The deliberate, repetitive neural input of information (DRNI) accelerates and consolidates learning, empowering us to transform our thoughts, behaviors, and perspectives, creating healthy new mindsets, skills, and abilities.

We hold monthly online group sessions on the science and implementation of proactive and active neuroplasticity, learning how to successfully devise a structured plan to pursue our goals and objectives.

WORKSHOPS

Online Social Anxiety Recovery Workshop

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The ultimate objectives of our Social Anxiety Recovery Workshop are to:

  • Provide the tools and techniques to replace years of toxic thoughts and behaviors with rational, healthy ones, dramatically alleviating the self-destructive symptoms of anxiety, depression, and other emotional malfunctions.
  • Compel the rediscovery and reinvigoration of the individual’s character strengths, virtues, and attributes.
  • Design a targeted behavioral self-modification process to help the individual re-engage their social comfort and status.
  • Provide the means to control our symptoms rather than allowing them to control us.

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Online Self-Empowerment Workshop

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The ultimate objectives of our Self-Empowerment Workshop are to:

  • Provide the tools and techniques of proactive neuroplasticity to accelerate and consolidate goals and objectives.
  • Recognize and utilize our character strengths, virtues, and achievements.
  • Design a targeted process to regenerate our self-esteem and motivation.
  • Replace adverse habits with healthy new ones that underscore our potential. 

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Online Lecture and Discussion
What is Proactive Neuroplasticity?

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What are active and proactive neuroplasticity, and why is their collaboration the most efficient means of learning and unlearning? What are the scientific and psychological validations?

Neuroplasticity is our brain’s continuous adaptation and restructuring to information. Science recognizes that our neural network is dynamic and malleable – realigning its pathways and rebuilding its circuits in response to all stimuli. 

Hemispheric synchronization is the collaboration of our left and right brain hemispheres to achieve optimal coherence.

Both proactive and active neuroplasticity are necessary for recovery-remission from emotional malfunction. They are the two processes of what Jeffrey Schwartz coined self-directed neuroplasticity. Our brain’s right hemisphere manages our emotions, creativity, intuition, and imagination. That is the function of active neuroplasticity. Proactive neuroplasticity attends to our left hemisphere’s rational, analytical, and quantitative pursuits. 

Neuroplasticity is the most efficient means of self-empowerment or recovery from emotional dysfunction. We dramatically accelerate and consolidate learning by deliberately compelling our brain to repattern its neural circuitry. Proactive and active neuroplasticity empowers us to consciously transform our thoughts and behaviors, creating healthy new mindsets, skills, and abilities. It gives us the power to take control of our emotional well-being and quality of life.

Recent Posts

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WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT?  ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing neuroscience and psychology including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.

Hemispheric Synchronization via Active and Proactive Neuroplasticity

Anxiety, Behavior, Mental Health, Neuroplasticity, Psychology, Self-Empowerment, Social Anxiety, Social anxiety disorder, , , , ,

Robert F Mullen, PhD
Director/ReChanneling

Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.

The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided apply to most emotional malfunctions, including depression, substance abuse, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and self-esteem and motivation issues. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.  

“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid, Málaga)   

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Recent Posts

Perfectionism and Unreasonable Expectations

Coping Mechanisms for Social Anxiety

Negative Words Impede Recovery

Heaven’s Reward Fallacy

Dual Perspectives on Shame in Recovery

Hemispheric Synchronization via Active and Proactive Neuroplasticity

We learn through hemispheric synchronization, which is the collaboration of the left and right hemispheres of our brain to achieve optimal coherence. We aggressively and consciously utilize both hemispheres of our brain through active and proactive neuroplasticity.

Hemispheric Synchronization via Active and Proactive Neuroplasticity

We learn through hemispheric synchronization, which is the collaboration of the left and right hemispheres of our brain to achieve optimal coherence. We aggressively and consciously utilize both hemispheres of our brain through active and proactive neuroplasticity.

Execution accelerates and consolidates our three recovery objectives: to

  1. Replace or overwhelm our negative thoughts and behaviors with healthy, productive ones.
  2. Produce rapid, concentrated neurological stimulation to overwhelm the negative abundance of our neural network.
  3. Regenerate our self-esteem through mindfulness of our assets.

Both proactive and active neuroplasticity are necessary for recovery-remission from emotional malfunction. They are the two processes of what Jeffrey Schwartz coined self-directed neuroplasticity. Our brain’s right hemisphere manages our emotions, creativity, intuition, and imagination. That is the function of active neuroplasticity. Proactive neuroplasticity attends to our left hemisphere’s rational, analytical, and quantitative pursuits. 

Neuroplasticity

Plasticity is the quality of being easily shaped or molded.  Neuroplasticity is our brain’s continuous adaptation and restructuring to sensation, experience, and information. Neuroscience recognizes that our neural network is dynamic and malleable – realigning its pathways and rebuilding its circuits in response to all recognized stimuli. 

Recovery and Self-Empowerment

Recovery is regaining possession or control of something stolen or lost. Self-empowerment is making a conscious decision to become stronger and more confident in controlling our lives. In neuroses such as anxiety, depression, and comorbidities, what has been stolen or lost is our emotional well-being and quality of life. In self-empowerment, it is the loss of self-esteem and motivation. So, both recovery and self-empowerment focus on regaining what has been lost. 

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Register Early

Accelerated Learning

We accelerate and consolidate learning and unlearning by compelling our brain to restructure its neural circuitry. This deliberate realignment confirms that our emotional well-being is self-determined. We are impacted by outside forces over which we have limited to no control, including life’s vicissitudes, physical deterioration, and hostilities. Notwithstanding, our psychological health is determined by how we react to things – how we respond to adversity as well as fortune and opportunity. The onus of recovery and self-empowerment rests with us. We control our emotional well-being.

There is an underlying theme we adhere to in recovery and self-empowerment. We cease to define ourselves by the negative aspects of our being, i.e., our faults and deficiencies, and redefine ourselves by our character strengths, virtues, and attributes. We do not win our battles with defective weapons but with tools of optimal efficiency. Mindfulness (recognition, comprehension, and acceptance) of this pragmatism promotes our transformation.

Human Brain Neuroplasticity

We consciously and deliberately transform our thoughts and behaviors through neuroplasticity, creating healthy new mindsets, skills, and abilities. Our informed and deliberate engagement provokes change rather than reacting and responding to it. Both proactive and active neuroplasticity compel this change.

Information alerts a receptor neuron that sends electrical data to a sensory neuron, stimulating presynaptic neurons that forward it to millions of participating neurons, causing a cellular chain reaction in multiple interconnected areas of our brain. 

Long-Term Potentiation

In addition, deliberate neuroplasticity activates long-term potentiation, increasing the nerve impulses’ strength and generating more energy. Additionally, the process creates higher levels of BDNF (brain-derived neurotrophic factors) – proteins associated with improved cognitive functioning, mental health, and memory. 

Neural Reciprocation

The neural chain reaction generated by repetition reciprocates, in abundance, the energy of the information. Millions of neurons amplify the electrical activity on a massive scale. Positive information in, positive energy returned in abundance. Conversely, negative information in, negative energy reciprocated in abundance. Thus, the value of positive reinforcement.

Hormonal Neurotransmissions

The heightened activity of our axon pathways boosts the neurotransmissions of chemical hormones, feeding us GABA for relaxation, dopamine for pleasure and motivation, endorphins to boost our self-esteem, and serotonin for a sense of well-being. Acetylcholine supports neuroplasticity, glutamate enhances our memory, and noradrenalin improves concentration. To date, neuroscientists have discovered over fifty chemical hormones.

Three Forms

Human neuroplasticity happens in three forms. 

Reactive neuroplasticity is our brain’s natural response to things over which we have limited to no control – stimuli we absorb but do not initiate: a car alarm, lightning, or the smell of baked pastries. Our neural network automatically restructures itself to what happens around us. 

Active neuroplasticity happens through intentional pursuits like creating, yoga, and journaling. We control active neuroplasticity because we consciously choose the activity. A significant component of active neuroplasticity is our altruistic and compassionate social behavior, e.g., teaching, compassion, and random acts of kindness.

Proactive neuroplasticity is rapid, concentrated neurological stimulation to change the polarity of our neural network from toxic to positive. We execute this by our deliberate, repetitive neural input of information.

Our ability to deliberately accelerate and consolidate learning and unlearning is significant. Over the years, our brain structures itself around negative neural input, forming in childhood and increasing exponentially due to our inherent negative bias and the vicissitudes of life. The primary objective in recovery and self-empowerment is replacing or overwhelming negative information with positive neural input. 

Proactive Neuroplasticity

Proactive neuroplasticity is the most effective method of positive neural restructuring. Through the deliberate, repetitive, neural input of information (DRNI), we compel our brains to change their negative polarity to positive. This activity is supported by our brain’s left hemisphere – the analytical part responsible for rational thinking.

While proactive neuroplasticity attends to the analytical, active neuroplasticity addresses the emotional, social, and spiritual. What one lacks in neural productivity is fulfilled by the other. 

Active Neuroplasticity

Active neuroplasticity replaces our self-destructive thoughts and behaviors while regenerating our self-esteem. Creating healthy new mindsets, skills, and abilities requires positive and repetitive neural input. 

Active neuroplasticity happens through intentional pursuits that counteract the years of adverse neural information. We replace or overwhelm our negative tendencies and negotiate a more balanced perspective by rediscovering and utilizing our inherent and acquired character strengths, virtues, and attributes disrupted by our emotional malfunction. 

We pay attention to our bodies through exercise, dancing, and yoga. We improve our cognitive functions through culture, creativity, and other mental pursuits. Introspection, meditation, and self-compassion enhance our spirit. Our emotional well-being is addressed through CBT, positive psychologies, and other individually targeted approaches.

Beyond the synthetic and creative products of active neuroplasticity is our ethical and compassionate social behavior. Contributions to others and society are extraordinary assets to our recovery objectives. The value of volunteering – providing support, empathy, and concern for those in need not only promotes positive behavioral change but also accelerates and consolidates neural restructuring. Likewise, the social interconnectedness established by caring interconnectivity augments the regeneration of our self-esteem and self-appreciation. 

Inherent Collaboration

Both proactive and active neuroplasticity assist in the positive transformation of our thoughts and behaviors. Their collaboration reinforces and strengthens neural restructuring. Proactive neuroplasticity (rational, analytical, quantitative, DRNI) is self-oriented; active neuroplasticity (emotional, creative, intuitive, qualitative) is self- and other-oriented. Their activities collaborate, as do our two neural hemispheres. 

Gestalt psychology considers the human mind and behavior as a whole. Radical behaviorism considers observable behaviors and the diversity of human thought and experience. That calls for a collaboration of science, philosophy, and psychology. Philosophy, existentially defined, welcomes religious and spiritual insight. Neuroscience and psychology collaborate in recovery from emotional malfunction and the pursuit of our goals and objectives. The whole is greater than the sum of its parts. 

Self-Esteem/Self-Appreciation

Self-esteem is mindfulness of our qualities and character as well as our defects. It is how we think about ourselves, how we think others think about us, and how we process that information. Healthy self-esteem tells us we are of value, consequential, and desirable. The inherent byproduct of that realization is self-appreciation. It is self-esteem paid forward. Consolidating our self-regard and recognizing what we have to offer drives us to share it with others. Self-appreciation is the natural evolution of self-esteem.

Proactive and active neuroplasticity are necessary collaborative mechanisms for neural restructuring, reframing our thoughts and behaviors, and regenerating our self-esteem and self-appreciation.

Proactive Neuroplasticity YouTube Series

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WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT?  ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing neuroscience and psychology including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.

Testimonials

Anxiety, Mental Health, Neuroplasticity, Psychology, ReChanneling, Self-Empowerment, Social Anxiety, Social anxiety disorder, , , ,

Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.

The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided are applicable to most emotional malfunctions including depression, substance abuse, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and issues of self-esteem and motivation. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior. 

The Value of Testimonials

Social anxiety disorder is ostensibly the most underrated and misunderstood psychological affliction.  It is culturally identifiable by the persistent fear and avoidance of social interaction and performance situations, which causes us to miss the life experiences that connect us with the world. 

Nicknamed the neglected anxiety disorder, SAD is routinely misdiagnosed. Few professionals understand it, and even fewer want to deal with it. Experts cite the mental health community’s difficulty distinguishing its symptoms and identifying specific etiological risk factors. 

The primary goal of recovery from social anxiety is the moderation of our irrational fears and anxieties. This is achieved through a three-pronged approach:

  1. Replace or overwhelm our negative thoughts and behaviors with healthy, productive ones.
  2. Produce rapid, concentrated neurological stimulation to overwhelm the negative abundance of our neural network.
  3. Regenerate our self-esteem through mindfulness of our assets.

Consequently, one-size-fits-all approaches are inefficient. Recovery must consider the diversity of human thought and experience. That calls for a collaboration of neuroscience, philosophy, and psychology. Philosophy, existentially defined, welcomes religious and spiritual insight. Additionally, individual environments, heritage, experiences, and associations reflect our wants, choices, and aspirations. If they are not given consideration, then we are not valued. 

Listening to and sharing the experiences and expertise of others broadens our perspective and understanding. Many of the ideas that eventually become an integral part of recovery come from the thoughts and contributions of colleagues and clients in our groups and workshops. Furthermore, by supplementing our workshops, posts, and publications with innovative and evolving ideas, opinions, and experiences, we better serve the community by providing a full and comprehensive overview of emotional malfunction and methods of recovery.

Client testimonials provide a narrow but measured perspective on how well we are listening and meeting our objectives.

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“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI—deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Valencia, Málaga, Madrid)

“I joined Robert’s SAD workshop at a time where I felt lost, alone, and unconfident. After a handful of weeks and exercises, Robert’s program provided me with the tools to start seeking and navigating relationships. Maintaining a social life is hard work, and Robert encourages the introspective work necessary to put our best foot forward while maintaining a constructive environment for us to overcome our social hang-ups.” – Bryce S. (Workshop Graduate)

I have never encountered such an efficient professional … His work transpires dedication, care, and love for what he does.” – Jose Garcia Silva, PhD, composer of Cosmos            

“I would like to say thank you for a well-organized learning experience. I can’t tell you how much I really appreciate this program. I feel so confident and ready to utilize these resources/tools you’ve provided.” – Trish D. (Workshop Graduate)      

“Thank you so much! I’m so excited! I really need this.” 
– Kelsey D. (Group Member)

“One of the most difficult things for those of us with social anxiety is to take the leap to join a recovery program. Dr. Mullen’s Social Anxiety Workshop has been a tremendous help for me in getting back control of my anxiety. The weekly workshops are tailored to the individual(s) learning style, and comfortability, so there was never a time I felt in over my head. It was not always easy work, but with Dr. Mullen’s positivity, compassion, and encouragement, I can say it is one of the best investments I have made in myself, and I will continue to improve and benefit from it for the rest of my life.” – Nick P. (Workshop Graduate)

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“I’ve lived with social anxiety for decades. I spent many years (and thousands of dollars) on conventional talk therapy, self-help books, and medication, without experiencing any real change or relief. ReChanneling’s Social Anxiety Workshop produced results within a few sessions, with continuing improvement throughout the workshop and beyond. I’m now much more at ease in situations that were major sources of anxiety and avoidance for me just a few months ago. The shared experience of working through social anxiety with other people who “get it” is powerful … Dr. Mullen is truly committed to our growth and recovery.” – Liz D. (Workshop Graduate)

“A leading expert on social anxiety disorder and its comorbidities, Dr. Mullen is the father of proactive neuroplasticity.” – Lake Shore Unitarian Society, Winnetka, IL

“It is refreshing to work with an organization that possesses sincere commitment, ethics, and genuinely cares about its clients.”
– Sharon Hoery & Associates, Colorado

“I attended the online recovery workshop. Dr. Mullen is considered a leading expert on anxiety and depression, etc. If you want to regain your sense of self-worth and confidence, you may want to consider recovery. It’s a bit of work but well worth the effort.” – Matty S. (Workshop Graduate)

“Dr. Mullen hits the nail on the head with ReChanneling.” 
– Reverend Richard Carlini

“I like Robert’s SAD recovery program, especially how it’s taking many of my negative thoughts away and replacing them with positive ones. I also appreciate the others that are in our recovery group, as we all mingle quite well. And, of course, Robert is always there as nurturing and positive friend.” – Michael Z. (Workshop Graduate)

“I love his classes because the only pressure comes from within, not from the instructor, who clearly loves and knows what he is doing.” – Leon V. (Workshop Graduate)

“I am simply in awe at the writing, your insights, your deep knowing of transcendence, your intuitive understanding of psychic-physical pain, your connection of the pain to healing, your concept/title, and above all, your innate compassion.” – Janice Parker, PhD

“I do see the light at the end of the tunnel and that’s something I didn’t have before the workshop. As far as I’m concerned, that pretty much says it all.” – David C. (Workshop Graduate)                  

Proactive Neuroplasticity YouTube Series

 *          *          *

WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT?  ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing neuroscience and psychology including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.

The Character Resume

Anxiety, Behavior, Depression, Mental Health, Neuroplasticity, Psychology, ReChanneling, Self-Empowerment, Social Anxiety, Social anxiety disorder, , , ,

Robert F Mullen, PhD
Director/ReChanneling

Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.

The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided are applicable to most emotional malfunctions including depression, substance abuse, panic disorder, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and issues of self-esteem and motivation. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior. 

“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid, Málaga)   

The Character Resume

“Human greatness does not lie in wealth or power,
but in character and goodness. People are just people,
and all people have faults and shortcomings,
but all of us are born with a basic goodness.”
– Anne Frank

A character resume is a written compilation of our positive qualities, achievements, and memories. Mindfully retrieving and cataloging these qualities compels us to embrace our value, confirming we are desirable, consequential, and worthy.

Mindfulness is recognition, cognition, and acceptance of reality, as opposed to an opinion or belief lacking evidence or foundation. Self-esteem is mindfulness of our value to self, society, and the world. The trajectory of our negative self-beliefs disrupts the development of our positive self-qualities. This, then, erodes mindfulness of our inherent and acquired character strengths, virtues, and attributes. Fortunately, these qualities are not erased but misplaced, lost, stolen, or compartmentalized away from our consciousness.

The definition of recovery is regaining possession or control of something stolen or lost. In social anxiety and comorbidities, what has been stolen or lost is our emotional well-being and quality of life.

Insufficient Satisfaction of Needs

Self-esteem can further be understood as a complex interrelationship between how we think about ourselves, how we think others perceive us, and how we process and present that information. Maslow’s hierarchy of needs reveals how childhood disturbance and subsequent negative self-beliefs disrupt our emotional development by denying us satisfaction of certain fundamental needs.

Core beliefs of abandonment, detachment, exploitation, and neglect subvert certain biological, physiological, and emotional support. This lacuna negatively impacts our self-esteem which we express by undervaluing our positive qualities. Again, this does not signify obliteration, but diminishment or latency due to inactivity or suppression. 

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Purpose of the Character Resume

In his examination of anxiety and depression, Aaron Beck, the pioneer of cognitive-behavioral therapy, maintained that social anxiety provokes feelings of helplessness, hopelessness, and unworthiness. The concept of undesirability revealed itself in our SAD recovery workshops. Until we commit to recovery, we continue to be manipulated by these destructive self-beliefs. 

Again, to emphasize Sun Tzu’s words of wisdom, “If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles.” I am continually amazed at how little SAD persons know their symptoms. It is as if, by ignoring them, they do not exist or will somehow go away. Ignorance is a major impediment to recovery. How can we fix something if we do not know why it malfunctions? How do we regenerate our character qualities if we remain blissfully unaware of what they are? Thus, the value of the character resume.

An objective of recovery is to become mindful of our inherent and acquired character strengths, virtues, attributes, and achievements. This includes mutual consideration of our shortfalls, as well. Again, we are repairing our brokenness.

Elements of a Character Resume

What goes into our character resume? The simple answer is anything and everything that stimulates a positive personal response including our successes, achievements, contributions, personal milestones, talents, charitable deeds, and happy memories.

How does building a character resume support our recovery?

Overwhelming Negativity

Childhood disturbance generates negative core beliefs that influence our intermediate attitudes, rules, and assumptions. These attributions produce a cognitive bias that compels us to misinterpret information and make self-destructive decisions. Since we humans are hard-wired with a negativity bias, we already respond more favorably to adversity. Add our SAD symptomatology and our neural network is replete with toxic information.

We convey this in our thoughts, behaviors, and the words we use to express them.

Throughout our lives, we are consumed and conditioned by adversity. SAD sustains itself through our negative self-beliefs and image. By the age of sixteen, we have heard the word no from our parents, roughly, 135,000 times. Some of us use the same unfortunate characterizations repeatedly. It is not just the words we say aloud in criticism and conversations. The self-annihilating words we silently call ourselves support our adverse thoughts and behaviors.

Additionally, we are continuously impacted by outside negative forces over which we have limited to no control, such as life’s vicissitudes, physical deterioration, and subjected hostilities.

Our neural network is replete with negative information. A character resume is a constant, visual reminder of our value and significance.

Utilizing Our Character Resume

The primary goal of recovery from social anxiety is the moderation of our irrational fears and anxieties. This is achieved through a three-pronged approach.

  1. Replace or overwhelm our negative thoughts and behaviors with healthy, productive ones.
  2. Produce rapid, concentrated neurological stimulation to overwhelm the negative abundance of our neural network.
  3. Regenerate our self-esteem through mindfulness of our assets.

These comprise our overall strategy.

Replace

The goal is to replace or overwhelm our adverse thoughts and behaviors with positive ones. Our character resume is constructed with our positive qualities, achievements, and memories. It is these attributions that replace the abundance of negative self-beliefs acquired throughout life. These qualities that were lost, misplaced, or compartmentalized, are retrieved and recognized through recovery approaches, e.g., personal introspection and inventory, memory work, cognitive comprehension, and other tools and techniques. They are subsequently input into our character resume.

Restructure

Proactive neuroplasticity produces rapid, neurological stimulation to change the polarity of our neural network. Our brain receives around two million bits of data per second but is capable of processing roughly 126 bits, so it is important to provide substantial information. DRNI is the deliberate, repetitive, neural input of Information. A deliberate act is a premeditated one; we initiate and control the process. Repetition accelerates and consolidates neural renewal and connectivity. Information that is sound, reasonable, goal-focused, and unconditional determines its strength and integrity. The information we assemble in our character resume generates the most efficient words and statements to accelerate and consolidate the process of neural restructuring.

Regenerate

Regenerate means to renew or restore something, especially after it has been damaged or lost. The qualities that comprise our self-esteem have been misplaced, lost, stolen, or compartmentalized away from our consciousness due to the disruption in our psychological development.

The process of regeneration in recovery is supported by clinically practical tools and techniques designed for the process. Also, the three goals or strategies of recovery – replace, restructure, and regenerate – are complementary and mutually interactive.

What Goes Into our Character Resume?

Some of the entries into our character resume include our positive personal affirmations, rational response to our ANTs, affirmative visualizations, character strengths, virtues, and attributes rediscovered through various exercises, retrievable happy memories, and self-esteem attributes from various inventories.

One additional and equally important benefit of a character resume is the constant and renewed reminder of what we have complied on the written page. It is an invaluable resource to moderate those situations that may continue to generate automatic negative thoughts, behaviors, and other adverse self-beliefs.

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Proactive Neuroplasticity YouTube Series

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WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT?  ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing scientific and clinically practical methods including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.

Emotional Malfunction: Why Me?

Anxiety, Behavior, Neuroplasticity, Psychology, ReChanneling, Self-Empowerment, Social Anxiety, Social anxiety disorder, , , ,

Robert F Mullen, PhD
Director/ReChanneling

Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.

The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided are applicable to most emotional malfunctions including depression, substance abuse, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and issues of self-esteem and motivation. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.

“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid Málaga)

Emotional Malfunction: Why Me?

“Maybe the journey isn’t so much about becoming anything.
Maybe it is about un-becoming everything that isn’t really you,
so you can be who you were meant to be in the first place.”
– Paul Coelho

Our condition emanates from childhood disturbance. Subsequent self-disapproving core beliefs inform our intermediate beliefs. These are adversely impacted by the adolescent onset of our emotional malfunction. Fostered by our inherent negativity bias, unwholesome thoughts and behaviors flourish throughout our adulthood, disrupting our emotional well-being and quality of life.

Social anxiety disorder and comorbidities compel us to view ourselves as helpless, hopeless, undesirable, and worthless. Like proverbial wandering lambs, we expose our flanks to the wolves of irrationality. We feel helpless, hopeless, undesirable, and worthless. That is how our malfunction sustains itself.

The trajectory of our negative thoughts and behaviors is not perfectly linear but is a collaboration of complementary and overlapping stages. Complementarity describes how a unit can only function optimally if its components work effectively and in concert. Our social anxiety functions optimally because it is sustained by our negative core and intermediate beliefs, influenced by childhood disturbance and the onset of our disorder. All these attributions are considered in recovery albeit the causes are not as important as the solution.

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Core Beliefs

Our trajectory begins with our core beliefs – the deeply held convictions that determine how we see ourselves in the world. We formulate them in childhood in response to information, experiences, inferences and deductions, and by accepting what we are told as true. They mold the unquestioned underlying themes that govern our assumptions and, ostensibly, remain as our belief system throughout life. When we decline to question our core beliefs, we act upon them as though they are real and true. 

Core beliefs are more rigid in SAD persons because we tend to store information consistent with negative beliefs, ignoring evidence that contradicts it. This produces a cognitive bias – a subconscious error in thinking that leads us to misinterpret information, impacting the accuracy of our perspectives and decisions. That is different from our inherent negativity bias, which is the human tendency to prioritize negative stimuli and past negative events and situations.

Childhood Disturbance

During the development of our core beliefs, we are subject to a childhood disturbance, be it accidental, intentional, real, or imagined. Childhood disturbance is a broad and generic term for anything that interferes with our optimal physical, cognitive, emotional, or social development.

These disturbances are universal and indiscriminate. Cumulative evidence that a toxic childhood is a primary causal factor in lifetime emotional insecurity and instability has been well-established.

Negative Core Beliefs 

Childhood disturbance generates negative core beliefs about the self. Feelings of abandonment, detachment, neglect, and exploitation are common consequences of childhood disturbance. These generate negative core beliefs about the self and others.

Self-oriented negative core beliefs compel us to view ourselves as inconsequential and insignificant. This generates self-blaming for our perceived inadequacies and incompetence.

Our other-oriented negative core beliefs cause us to define others as demeaning, dismissive, malicious, and manipulative. This allows us to blame others for our condition, avoiding personal accountability. It also rationalizes our fears of interconnectivity and avoidance of social situations.

Emotional Malfunction

The next stage in our trajectory is the onset of our emotional malfunction which corresponds with our developing intermediate beliefs. Roughly 90% of disorder onset happens during adolescence, albeit the manifestation of symptoms often occurs later in life. SAD infects around the age of thirteen due to a combination of genetic and environmental factors. Researchers recently discovered a specific serotonin transporter gene called “SLC6A4” that is strongly correlated with SAD. Nonetheless, the susceptibility to onset originates in childhood.

Disturbance, negative core beliefs, and onset generate low implicit and explicit self-esteem and heavily influence our intermediate beliefs.

Insufficient Satisfaction of Needs

Self-esteem is mindfulness of our value to ourselves, society, and the world. It can be further understood as a complex interrelationship between how we think about ourselves, how we think others perceive us, and how we process and present that information.

Maslow’s hierarchy of needs reveals how childhood disturbance disrupts our natural development. The orderly flow of social and emotional development requires satisfying fundamental human needs. Childhood disturbance and negative core beliefs subvert certain biological, physiological, and emotional needs like familial support, healthy relationships, and a sense of safety and belongingness. This lacuna negatively dramatically impacts our self-esteem which we express by our undervaluation or regression of our positive self-qualities.

A quick note regarding mindfulness. The concept of mindfulness is essential to recovery and used throughout. However, there is appreciable ambiguity when it comes to defining it. For our purposes, it means recognizing, understanding, and accepting the veracity of something. If we understand a concept or theory about something but don’t believe it is true or valid, then we are not being mindful. Likewise, if we recognize the concept but don’t understand it, then we are still left in the dark.

Negative Intermediate Beliefs 

The onset of SAD happens during the development of our intermediate beliefs. These establish our attitudes, rules, and assumptions. Attitudes refer to our emotions, convictions, and behaviors. Rules are the principles or regulations that govern our behaviors. Our assumptions are what we believe to be true or real. Intermediate beliefs are less rigid than core beliefs and influenced by our social, cultural, and environmental information and experience. 

Negative Self-Beliefs and Image

All of these attributions produce distorted and maladaptive understandings of the self, others, and the world. Adaptive thoughts and behaviors are positive and functional. Maladaptive thoughts contort our reasoning and judgment, compelling us to ‘adapt’ negatively (maladapt) to situations. Distorted and irrational thoughts lead to dysfunctional behaviors and vice versa.

Situations, ANTs, and Cognitive Distortions

A situation is a set of circumstances – the facts, conditions, and incidents affecting us at a particular time in a particular place. A feared situation is one that provokes fears/anxieties that negatively impact our activities and associations.

We articulate our fears /anxieties through preprogrammed, self-fulfilling prophecies called ANTs. Automatic negative thoughts are involuntary, anxiety-provoking assumptions that spontaneously appear in response to anxiety-provoking situations. Examples include the classroom, a job interview, a social event, and family occasions. ANTs are negatively oriented, untruthful, and have no real power over us unless we enable them. Assumptions caused by our negative self-beliefs impact their content and expression.

Cognitive distortions are the exaggerated or irrational thought patterns involved in the perpetuation of our anxiety and depression. They twist our thinking to reinforce or justify our toxic behaviors. A prime example would be filtering, where we selectively choose to dwell on the negative aspects of a situation while overlooking the positive. We distort reality to avoid or validate our irrational attitudes, rules, and assumptions.

Solutions

We are not defined by our disorder, however. We are defined by our character strengths, virtues, and achievements. Through recovery, we dissociate ourselves from our condition. By stepping outside of the target, we perceive things rationally and objectively.

We learn to identify and analyze our negative attributions. ANTs, cognitive distortions, and maladaptive thoughts are emotional reactions to situations that call for rational evaluation and response.

Recovery and self-empowerment is regaining what has been stolen, misplaced, or lost. For social anxiety, it is our emotional well-being and quality of life. In self-empowerment, it is our self-esteem and motivation. In regaining these things, we consciously and deliberately transform our adverse habits, creating healthy new mindsets, skills, and abilities. Recovery is letting go of our negative self-perspectives and beliefs. Recovery opens us to possibilities unencumbered by prior acts.

Proactive Neuroplasticity YouTube Series

*          *          *

WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT?  ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing scientific and clinically practical methods including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.

Self-Empowered Means Forgiving

Anxiety, Behavior, Mental Health, Neuroplasticity, Psychology, ReChanneling, Self-Empowerment, Social Anxiety, Social anxiety disorder, , , ,

Robert F Mullen, PhD
Director/ReChanneling

Subscriber numbers generate contributions that support scholarships for workshops.

The distinction between social anxiety disorder and social anxiety is a matter of severity; reference to one includes the other. The recovery tools and techniques provided are applicable to most emotional malfunctions including depression, substance abuse, ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety, and issues of self-esteem and motivation. These malfunctions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior.

“Dr. Mullen is doing impressive work helping the world. He is the pioneer of proactive neuroplasticity utilizing DRNI – deliberate, repetitive, neural information.” – WeVoice (Madrid Málaga)

Self-Empowered Means Forgiving

“It is not ‘forgive and forget,’ as if nothing wrong had ever happened,
but ‘forgive and go forward,’ building on the past mistakes and the energy
generated by reconciliation to create a new future.” – Alan Paton

There are three types of emotional conflict that, when left unresolved, negatively impact our psychological well-being: (1) those inflicted on us by others, (2) those we inflict on others, and (3) those we inflict on ourselves. In each instance, we are victims and abusers.

Victimized by the transgression against us, we self-abuse with our anger and resentment. When we transgress, we abuse the other and victimize ourselves with our shame and guilt. We self-victimize when we harm ourselves – a particularly insidious form of emotional self-abuse.

Dispatching these conflicts require forgiveness.

We retain an abundance of destructive information, formed by our core and intermediate beliefs – toxic neural input seemingly impervious to uprooting due to their repressive nature. A lot of this information stems from the unresolved debris of our negatively valenced emotions. Valanced is a psychological term used to characterize specific emotions that adversely affect our daily lives. Emotions like shame, guilt, and resentment negatively impact our thoughts, behaviors, and relationships. When left unresolved, they permeate our neural network with negative energy and obstruct the process of recovery. 

Mistreatment by Other

We often hold onto anger and resentment because we convince ourselves it impacts those who harmed us. However, they are likely unaware or have forgotten their transgression or take no responsibility for it. The only person affected is us, the injured party. As Buddha purportedly said, “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; we are the one who gets burned.”

The act of forgiving resolves our animus and restores us to equal footing by eliminating the past and the other’s influence. Our innate drive for vengeance can be formidable; our baser instinct wants retribution. Forgiving removes our need for retaliation. It rids us of our vindictiveness. 

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Mistreatment of Other

Forgiving ourselves for harming another is accepting and releasing the toxicity of our actions. It is important to recognize that transgression against another subjectively affects us more severely than the person we harmed. We feel guilt for harming them, and shame for being the type of person who would cause harm. These self-destructive emotions can only be resolved by accepting responsibility, making direct or substitutional amends, and forgiving ourselves.

Self-Transgression

Self-transgression is particularly cataclysmic. It is defining ourself as deserving of abuse. Self-pity, contempt, and other hyphenated forms of self-sabotage devalue our self-esteem. Self-transgression invariably leads to blaming to relieve ourselves of the guilt.

Forgiving ourselves is challenging for those of us with social anxiety because our actions are underscored by our negative core and intermediate beliefs. By withholding forgiveness, we allow the transgressor to occupy valuable space in our brains. We are so inundated from childhood with the concept of forgiveness, we tend to disregard its power and significance.

Recovery Goals

The primary goal of recovery from social anxiety is the moderation of our irrational fears and anxieties. In self-empowerment, it is the rebuilding of our self-esteem and motivation. We execute these goals through a three-pronged approach.

  1. Replace or overwhelm our negative thoughts and behaviors with healthy, productive ones.
  2. Produce rapid, concentrated neurological stimulation to overwhelm the negative abundance of our neural network.
  3. Regenerate our self-esteem through mindfulness of our assets.

These goals are inhibited by our negatively valenced emotions.

We fail to challenge these emotions because we have acclimated. We justify, savor, or wear them like a hair shirt. Not knowing any better, our neural network is accustomed to this negativity and continuously transmits the chemical hormones and other physiological benefits that sustain and give us pleasure.

The process of recovery consolidates and accelerates neural restructuring by feeding it positive stimuli to counter the years of symptomatic negativity. But our brains have less room for healthy input unless and until we evict the bad tenants. Retaining the toxicity of our self-destructive emotions aggravates our anxiety and depression, and compels behavioral obsessiveness, avoidance, and other personality shortfalls that impact our interconnectedness and self-esteem.

Negatively valenced emotions do have their usefulness. They can be revealing and motivating, precipitating emotional and spiritual growth and broadening self-awareness. Notwithstanding, resolution is important to rid ourselves of their neural residue. The inability or unwillingness to forgive is self-defeating.

Recovery requires letting go of our negative self-perspectives, expectations, and beliefs. It opens our minds to new ideas and concepts. Holding onto shame, guilt, and other hostile self-indulgences keeps us imprisoned in the past. Forgiving opens us to new possibilities unencumbered by prior acts. In the words of Mahatma Gandhi, “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”

I vividly recall a very likeable young man in one of our recovery groups who refused to entertain any prospect of absolving his parents. “If you knew what they’ve done to me you wouldn’t ask me to forgive them.” His adamancy was formidable. Despite his awareness of the ramifications, he denied himself the opportunity to purge the toxicity of his anger and resentment, much like a cancer victim refusing chemotherapy.

Forgiving is Not Forgetting

Forgiving expels negativity. We cannot hope to function optimally without absolving both ourselves and others whose actions impaired our emotional well-being. Our behaviors and those of others may seem indefensible, but forgiving is subjective. It is for our own well-being.

It is important to recognize that forgiving is not forgetting or condoning. It does not excuse transgressor or transgression; it takes their power away. Our noble self forgives; our pragmatic self remembers and remains mindful of the circumstance.

Holding ourselves or others accountable for harmful behavior are justifiable responses. Holding onto the corresponding anger and resentment is self-destructive. We forgive to promote change within ourselves and, as architects, we reap the rewards. 

Stand Outside of the Bullseye

When we find it challenging to forgive someone for the harm they have inflicted upon us, it is helpful to consider their perspective. What was their motivation? What was their temperament? What was happening in their own lives?

Our social anxiety compels us to over-personalize, prohibiting alternative viewpoints. Our cognitive distortions blind us to any reality that conflicts with our self-centered point of view. There are at least two sides to every story, however. Stepping outside of the bullseye and viewing it from the other’s perspective reveals the larger narrative. It broadens our understanding of the motivations of the perpetrator. It allows us to consider what pressures they were under, their environment, and their influences. Perhaps they were trying to teach us a valuable lesson or scare us into correcting our behavior. Imperfect motivations may not excuse the act; nonetheless, it is important to understand the intent.

One additional factor to consider is our personal accountability. Perhaps our behaviors were less than exemplary.

Write a Forgiveness Letter

Many experts tout the psychological benefits of writing a letter to the person who harmed us, sharing our perspective of the event. How did it make us feel? What are its residual effects?  How did it impact our relationship with the person and how do we feel about them now?

How would we have approached the situation? What would we have done differently to mitigate its emotional impact? What is our responsibility for the act?

Closing the letter with a statement of forgiveness and understanding concludes the situation and alleviates our feelings of resentment, shame, and guilt.

To resolve self-inflicted harm, we write that letter to ourselves, applying the same criteria. Through compassion and understanding, we recognize and accept that we are imperfect beings doing our best to live up to our expectations and potential.

Finally, we destroy the letter. Burn, bury, or shred it. There is no reason to allow a past, intangible action to preoccupy our thoughts. We symbolically wash our hands of the toxicity. The purpose of this exercise is to evict the bad tenants from our neural network, allowing room for new possibilities.

Make Amends and Move On

Rather than beating ourselves up for past behaviors, it is emotionally cathartic to apologize, make amends, and move on. As mature adults, we learn from our mistakes; if we choose to repeat them, we recognize we still have work to do. Given that our perpetrators have moved on, forgotten, or never took responsibility in the first place, making personal amends may be unfeasible and possibly dangerous. The most rational way to make amends is through altruistic and compassionate social behavior, e.g., teaching, compassion, and random acts of kindness.

Why hold onto something emotionally enervating from the past we cannot change or alter? The past is immutable. We have no control over it. It is the here-and-now and how it reflects on our future that is of value. The only logical response is to accept that it happened and realize it has no material impact on the present unless we allow it to fester. It is time to let it go and move on.

Proactive Neuroplasticity YouTube Series

*          *          *

WHY IS YOUR SUPPORT SO IMPORTANT?  ReChanneling develops and implements programs to (1) moderate symptoms of emotional malfunction and (2) pursue personal goals and objectives – harnessing our intrinsic aptitude for extraordinary living. Our paradigmatic approach targets the personality through empathy, collaboration, and program integration utilizing scientific and clinically practical methods including proactive neuroplasticity, cognitive-behavioral modification, positive psychology, and techniques designed to regenerate self-esteem. All donations support scholarships for groups, workshops, and practicums.